Epilogue
“Dear passengers, thank you for choosing Korean Air. We will be taking off shortly. Please switch off all…”
The message being played was drowned out in the man’s mind as he shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He knew he would probably be fidgeting throughout the flight. His heart was pounding from the uncertainty he was feeling since he received the call that morning.
Flashback…
“Micky-san?”
Micky Park Yoochun looked up from his work.
“Den-wa… there’s a call for you. I think it’s from Korea.”
A curious look appeared on the man’s face.
“Arigato.”
He replied, as he picked up the phone on his table and pressed to answer the call.
“Moshi moshi?”
“Dongsaeng… speak Korean please.”
A smile appeared on the man’s face.
“Jaejoong hyung! What a pleasant surprise!”
“I’d say… you need me to call you once in a while to check on you and you still feel surprised?”
Micky smiled sheepishly into the phone as he scratched the back of his head. It was just like his Jae hyung to behave like his umma but he did miss the other man very much. He had not seen him in the two years he moved to work in Japan. He would miss home very much every time he heard him over the phone. But Jaejoong never called him at his workplace. He always called Micky at his apartment at night.
“You never call me at my workplace. Is something wrong? This is not about Yunho hyung is it?”
“No… Yunho is fine. Don’t worry.”
Micky heaved a sigh of relief. Before he left Korea, he begged Jaejoong to keep in contact with Yunho and Changmin so that he would be able to know how the two men were doing. Jaejoong was reluctant at first. But it seems his friendship with the two became deeper over the two years and now they were working together in a multi-national company.
Yunho’s injury left him almost blind. But with special glasses, he was able to live life normally. However, the doctors did warn him that if he overstrained his eyes, he may go blind. Given Yunho’s drive, Micky was always worried that he may overwork himself and constantly asked Jaejoong to look after him. The older man had since cared for Yunho like he did with Micky. Without Micky around, Jaejoong probably could not kick the habit of fussing over another person and somehow, Yunho became that someone.
“Well, it can’t be about Hyesung hyung… how’s the man?”
“He’s fine too… still happily running his bar and seems to be developing something with Minwoo hyung… ha…”
Micky smiled widely when he heard that. It’s time Hyesung hyung moved on. It would be what his Jun Jin hyung would have wanted too.
“So you’re calling because you miss me? Heh…”
“…”
A frown clouded over Micky’s face when his joke did not get the response he expected.
“Something is wrong, isn’t it, hyung? What is it?”
Pause.
“It’s… it’s about Junsu… Yoochun.”
Micky could feel his throat turn dry. He had not heard this name for two years. Though he could not say the same for his thoughts. He had lost count of how many times he had dreamt of this person.
That day, after Junsu left his ward, he never saw the man again. He had tried to look for him. To look for another way out. To be together.
But Junsu refused to see him. Not even Changmin could help him.
So Yoochun decided to leave Korea. It was too painful for him to stay. Although in the eyes of the law he was acquitted of the charge of the murder of Kim Kang-In on the fact that he did it out of the defence for another, he had been given the death sentence in the eyes of Kim Junsu.
Yoochun knew Junsu did not hate him. But he also knew it was impossible for him to ask the other man to be with the person who killed his brother.
Knowing the situation between them, Jaejoong never once mentioned Junsu in their calls. He knew he would just be raking up an unhappy past of his dongsaeng’s. But now, Jaejoong actually called from Korea, to his workplace, and it was regarding Junsu. Yoochun could already feel his heart in his throat.
“What… what about Junsu, hyung? What happened?”
Now…
“Yoochun!”
The said man turned his head at the call of his name. A name he had not used for the past two years as it only served to remind him of the fact that he could never be with the person he loved.
“Until the day I am not Kim Junsu… and you are not Park Yoochun… we can never be together…”
“Jaejoong hyung,”
Despite all his troubled thoughts, Yoochun could not help but smile when he saw his hyung. He hugged Jaejoong tightly as soon as he reached his side. Jaejoong returned the hug as tightly. It felt good to see his dongsaeng after so long.
“I missed you so much, hyung. But you haven’t changed much.”
“How much could I have changed? I’m just glad you look quite good yourself.”
Both men smiled at each other before the elder one signaled for Yoochun to follow him.
“So…”
Yoochun started hesitantly, as he sat in the car with Jaejoong.
“Yeah?”
“Jun… Junsu is still… missing?”
Jaejoong let out a sigh before he turned to look briefly at Yoochun.
“Yeah… I called you immediately after Changmin and Yunho told me what happened. The minute Junsu found out about the matter, he just took off and was nowhere to be found. I guess they were desperate too… to ask me to get you back.”
Yoochun sat in silence. Things happened so suddenly that he did not know what to make of it. He did not even know if he did the right thing by returning to Korea. He did not know if this was what Junsu would have wanted.
Jaejoong glanced at his dongsaeng again before he turned back to watch the road before him.
“Well… besides being desperate… I think Yunho and Changmin were thinking of something else… you know what this implies right, Yoochun? I think Junsu ran away because he understood the implication of the matter. This changes a lot of things, Yoochun…”
“Don’t go on, hyung… I’m really confused now…”
“Well… you shouldn’t be… you should be glad. Frankly, all of us really hope to see the two of you happy. You two went through so much… you deserve to be happy. You two have been avoiding one another for nothing for the past two years. Don’t you think…”
“Hyung… I really need some peace and quiet… I need to think things over… could you send me somewhere?”
***
Yoochun pushed past the long grass absent-mindedly. He needed some peace and quiet to think. He needed to know what the best course of action was. He smiled a sad smile when he realised the last time he came to the beach was with Junsu.
He let out a long sigh as he pushed past the final batch of grass before he smelt the salt in the wind. He stood where he was, closed his eyes and just listened to the waves rushing in. He could feel himself relax a little already.
As he opened his eyes to walk nearer to the sea, he realised he was not alone on the beach.
There, standing near the waves was another man.
Junsu.
Yoochun blinked a few times to be sure his eyes were not playing tricks on him. He was sure it was Junsu. He could recognise the man anywhere. But he did not know if he was ready to face him. What was he supposed to say to him?
Before Yoochun could walk away, Junsu turned around.
Their gazes met.
They both stood frozen.
Silence.
When long enough had passed, Junsu seemed to have jolted out of his trance. He bent to pick up his jacket and walked very quickly past Yoochun to the only opening of the beach.
“Junsu, wait!”
Yoochun called out as he grabbed Junsu’s arm. He may not be ready to face the other man. But he was not going to just let him disappear from his sight.
“Can we talk? Please?”
Junsu had not turn around to face Yoochun. He had not expected to see Yoochun, much less talk to him. They had not spoken nor seen each other for two years. Junsu did not know what to say.
“Please, Junsu… We really need to talk… I cannot let you go… I know if I do… I probably would not see you again… Please…”
Junsu shut at his eyes at Yoochun’s pleading voice. He did not want to give in but he could not find a reason not to. He finally nodded his head.
They retreated back to the beach and sat, facing the vast ocean.
“I know what happened… Jaejoong hyung told me… They were worried about you…”
Junsu just kept silent.
Yoochun turned to glance briefly at Junsu. He still could not believe he was actually looking at the other man. He had a strong urge to just pull Junsu into his arms but he knew he could not do that. He wondered if he could ever do that again.
“How… how are you holding up?”
Junsu made a small movement of just looking out into the vast ocean. He still did not speak.
The sound of the waves hitting the shores was never louder as the silence between the two men ensued.
Yoochun bit his lower lip before he opened his mouth to speak.
“Is it… is it true? Is it true that you are… adopted?”
Junsu visibly tensed. He could feel his heart sink again. Just like that morning when his mother broke the news to him.
“Junsu… I should have told this to you sooner… but I needed time to come to terms with Kang-In’s death… but I think it is not fair for me to hide this from you any longer…”
“You are adopted… Junsu… I adopted you… because I wanted to get revenge at Kim Choi Won…”
“I was angry with his philandering ways… I was angry at the fact that he does not love me… I wanted to get back at him. I wanted to punish him. So I deliberately sent his son to an orphanage and adopted you. You were only a few months younger than Kang-In… I know Kim Choi Won would not be able to tell the difference. I know he would give you the best and train you to be the best… I wanted him to feel the betrayal when he finds out you are not his flesh and blood. I want him to have a taste of what it is like to be betrayed and made used of…“
“Mi-an-hae… It’s not fair to you at all… And I never expected my own son to seek revenge on us… I guess that is my retribution… I destroyed your life… I’m so so sorry…”
A single tear rolled down Junsu’s cheeks as he thought of what his mother said to him. Everything he believed in since he was born was a lie. Everything he had put his heart and soul into was a lie. His whole life was a big practical joke.
“Junsu?”
Yoochun’s voice made Junsu’s heart skip a beat. He missed hearing that voice. He missed feeling the warmth from those hands. It suddenly dawned on Junsu that Yoochun was the only real thing that happened to him.
Yet, he gave him up… for a family he did not belong to at all.
Junsu turned to face Yoochun finally. Something in him snapped.
“I can’t stay here…”
Junsu shouted out abruptly as he stood up to walk away.
“Junsu, wait! Ka-ji mah!”
Yoochun called after him as he ran to catch up.
“Let me go, Yoochun… I cannot face you… I don’t know how to face you!”
“Would you just calm down and talk things over!”
“I can’t…. I CAN’T! Let me go!”
“No…I cannot let you go… not after I just found you… not after there is a chance for us to be together again!”
“No… I don’t deserve you! I cannot be with you… you don’t deserve to be with someone like me…!”
“What are you talking about! Would you please stop running away from me!”
Yoochun picked up speed and grabbed Junsu’s shoulders to turn him around.
PUNCH!
Junsu fell from the impact of the punch onto the soft sand.
“How long do you want to run? Where can you run to? Why must you always run from me?!”
Yoochun was panting from the running and the shouting. He knew what Junsu was feeling. The younger man must feel guilty to have given up their relationship for nothing. But Yoochun understood it was not his fault. It was circumstances that forced them apart.
“It was not your fault! How long more do you want to punish yourself? How long more do you want to punish me?”
Junsu could feel angry tears clouding his vision as he lain on the sand. He gave up on Yoochun two years ago. How could he ask that Yoochun take him back now? He was a nobody now. He had no right to ask Yoochun back.
“I can’t… I cannot ask you to take me back now… It’s not fair to you… I don’t deserve this…”
Yoochun’s heart ached at the Junsu before him now. He had never seen Junsu think so little of himself. He had never seen Junsu so dejected before.
Yoochun walked slowly towards the other man.
“I want to be with you, Junsu. I’ve always wanted to… I’ve never stopped thinking about you for the past two years. I know this may be a blow to you… but we can be together now… Please be with me.“
Yoochun did not go any nearer to Junsu except to stand beside him. Junsu probably needed time to think things through. Yoochun did not want to put more pressure on the other man but he also wanted the other man to know that he would be there for him.
Junsu shut his eyes at Yoochun’s gentle words, causing tears to spill. He wanted very much to give in to Yoochun’s request. He wanted very much to be with the other man. Like Yoochun, Junsu never stopped thinking about the older man for the past two years. Sometimes, he even questioned his decision to give up their relationship. But he would always arrive at the same conclusion – he could not be with the man who killed his brother.
Yet, Fate has a cruel sense of humour. Kim Junsu did not belong to the Kim family at all. He sacrificed everything for the family – including Yoochun and in the end, he got nothing.
“No, Yoochun…”
Yoochun could feel a stab to his heart.
“I cannot be with you…”
“WHY?! I don’t understand!”
Yoochun could not help but shout. He cannot comprehend what Junsu was thinking. Nothing can stop them from being together now.
“Because… I have lost everything… My family… My identify… My love… ”
Yoochun just stood still and listened.
“If I be with you now… I would have lost my pride too… I cannot let that happen… Do you understand? I cannot let Fate do whatever it wants with me anymore… I want a say in my life… Can you understand?”
Yoochun gave a dry laugh. Junsu was right. All along, they were played at the hands of Fate. Fate brought them together, made them go through so many things, only to make it impossible for them to be together. Yet, it seems Fate had dealt its final card on them, as if telling them it has had its fun. The greatest joke was on Junsu and it was no wonder that the man now refused to do Fate’s bidding.
“The only thing I have a say in my life now… is you… Perhaps… all along… the only thing I could control about my life was you… and right now… I cannot be with you… not now… Mi-an-hae… Yoochun ah…”
Junsu had stood up and was facing Yoochun directly with bloodshot eyes. Yoochun’s eyes were puffy too from crying earlier.
“Sarang hae, Junsu ah…”
The spoken words lingered in the air, mixed with the constant sounds of the waves.
Yoochun had nothing else to say.
Junsu could tell Yoochun understood him. He always knew Yoochun would. He knew Yoochun would let him go. Like he did, two years ago.
Both men stood in silence, watching each other for a long time, before Junsu took the first step to leave.
Like he did, two years ago.
***
“Take care of yourself, Yoochun.”
Jaejoong spoke from the vicinity of Yoochun’s shoulders as they broke apart from their hug.
“Yeah… you take care too, hyung. And err…”
“I know… watch out for Junsu… I will…”
Yoochun gave a slight smile.
“Take care, Yoochun.”
“Thanks Yunho hyung. It was good catching up with you and Changmin.”
“Junsu hyung will come to his senses one day, Yoochun hyung.”
“Thanks Changmin… I err… don’t wish to think about it anymore. I’m quite tired… I just hope Junsu can be happy… wherever he is…”
The atmosphere visibly dropped by a few degrees at the mention of the missing man. It had been a week since Yoochun last saw Junsu. Yoochun did not try to locate the other man any more. The rest had no luck with finding him either. Yoochun did not deny that he remained in Korea as he still harboured a little hope that Junsu might return. But when one week had passed with no news of him, Yoochun decided it was time for him, and for them, to move on.
“Take things easy, dongsaeng… you’ve come a long way… things will pick up… they have to.”
“Thanks, Hyesung hyung. Oh… I’m gonna miss you all so much!”
Yoochun said earnestly as he lunged into Hyesung for a goodbye hug. The rest joined in. He’s got a feeling, he was not returning to Korea for a very long time. This place was too sad for him now.
***
“Dear passengers, thank you for choosing Korean Air. We will be taking off shortly. Please fasten your seatbelts and switch off…”
Yoochun laughed sadly to himself when a sense of déjà vu rushed over him when he heard the announcement. He looked out the window absent-mindedly, hoping to take in whatever he could of this country he was leaving behind.
He could feel another passenger stop beside his seat to put his luggage in the overhead compartment. Usually he would be curious to see who he would be sitting with for the flight. But he was in no mood that day.
“Hi…”
Yoochun could feel his hair stand up at the voice. He turned around slowly.
“Could you tell me where would be a good location to stay in Tokyo? I’m going there to rebuild my life and you seem like a nice enough person to ask.”
Yoochun looked wide-eyed at the person standing before him.
“I must be dreaming, right?”
“Erm… not unless you know who you are talking to…”
“Do I? Am I supposed to know you?”
The man laughed briefly before he sat down to face Yoochun with a solemn look.
“Mi-an hae… I know I have hurt you, Yoochun… so many times… I said that day I wanted a say in my life because I could not bring myself to just be with you because you came looking for me… call me proud if you must… but at that time… I feel that I have to leave you in order to retain what little pride I had left.”
Yoochun remained still as he listened… to Junsu who was looking straight at him.
“I needed time to sort things out. When I found out I was adopted, it was not just the fact that I gave you up for nothing. Everything I knew since I was born became nothing. Everything I sacrificed and believed in became nothing. I became nothing in that instant, Yoochun. It was too much for me to take all at once.”
Yoochun’s eyes softened as he listened to Junsu. He was not lying when he told Changmin he was tired. He was tired of hearing Junsu say sorry to him. He was tired of seeing Junsu walk away from him. Though he knew it was not Junsu’s fault, there was only so much he could take. He had really decided to move on. But after seeing and hearing Junsu, Yoochun realised moving on may not be as easy as he thought.
“When I saw you that day, I had so many thoughts running through me… I realised we could be together now… nothing could stop us…. …but something in me snapped, Yoochun. Being with you then seemed like my only choice… just like you shooting Kang-In to save me was your only choice… just like me giving you up two years ago was the only choice… I just hated that Fate decided everything for us and left me with no other choice.”
“So you chose to leave me again… just to get back at Fate? Am I just that to you? A way to get back at Fate?”
Yoochun said sorely. He did not understand what Junsu was implying.
“No… no… of course not… It’s just… I don’t wish to get back with you because it was my only choice. It’s not fair to you. Do you get what I am saying?”
“No… No, I don’t get what you are saying at all! I don’t even understand why you’re here at all!”
Yoochun raised his voice unintentionally. He was just too frustrated with how things turned out. And he still did not understand what Junsu wanted. He turned to look out the window, instead of at Junsu.
Junsu took a few breaths before he reached over to force Yoochun to face him. Yoochun tried to resist.
“What do you want from me, Junsu? Are you just trying to explain to me why you don’t want to be with me? I get it… because you wanna get back at Fate!”
“Would you just calm down and listen to me?”
“No…I don’t want to calm down… I don’t want to listen to you… Guess what, I don’t want to do your bidding… just like you don’t want to do Fate’s bidding… even though you SHOULD!”
“Stop being childish!”
“I am childish! Now could you please leave me alone!”
“No…”
“What do you mean -”
Time seemed to have come to a standstill as their lips met.
All senses in Yoochun’s body instantaneously tinkled as he tasted the heavens of Junsu’s mouth.
Junsu’s tense muscles relaxed as he took in Yoochun’s taste and breath in his mouth. He had missed it so much. His eyes fluttered close as he enjoyed the moment.
Before both boys realised, all eyes in the cabin were on them. As if they suddenly realised where they were, both of them broke apart at the same time.
“Now, can you listen to me?”
Junsu said, as he tried to ignore the funny looks he knew they were getting.
Yoochun adjusted his attire and his position on the seat as he muttered a ‘Fine’ under his breath.
Junsu blew out a heavy sigh before he started.
“What I mean is… I want to show you that I want to be with you… because I want it.”
Yoochun turned to stare at Junsu.
“I’m not with you because it is the only choice I have got… I want to be with you… because that is what I want. Because this is what I need… YOU. Get it?”
Junsu snapped, angry that Yoochun made him resort to kissing him in public before he would listen.
Yoochun blinked a few times and continued to stare at Junsu with a distracted look on his face.
Junsu started to frown.
Suddenly, Yoochun started to break into a wide smile and then into a laughing fit.
Junsu started to look worried.
“Yoochun ah… are you alright? Your illness is not acting up again, is it? Where’s your medication?”
Junsu searched through Yoochun’s jacket pockets frantically. He did not expect Yoochun to react like this. Was it too much for him to take?
“No!”
“What?”
Junsu shouted, unable to believe what Yoochun said to him.
“Why should I be at your beck and call? Why is it always about what you want? What about what I want?”
Junsu looked on the verge of tears.
“Alright, I’ve had my revenge. I’m joking… I’m joking!”
“Omph!”
Junsu could feel all air squeezed out of him when Yoochun pulled him in for a bear hug abruptly.
“YES YES YES!”
Junsu frowned with confusion for a while, but as Yoochun’s body warmth spread through his own, he was already smiling at the happiness he felt.
“You scared me… I thought you meant it when you said no… I mean… I’ve thought about the possibility of you rejecting me… but… it really hurt…”
“Well news flash for you… that is how I felt when you left me… TWICE… the second time was worse…”
Junsu fell silent at the realization of how much pain he had put Yoochun through.
“Sarang hae, Yoochun ah…”
Yoochun smiled to himself as he wrapped his arms tighter around Junsu’s small frame.
“I’m not dreaming, right? This is really happening, right?”
Junsu separated himself reluctantly from Yoochun’s arms to look straight at the other man.
“From now… till forever…”
Yoochun leaned in to capture Junsu’s lips with his own. He did not care even if the whole world was looking. At that moment, there were only the two of them.
Junsu felt the same.
“Does Jaejoong and the rest already know about this?”
“Nope… I did not tell anyone. We should probably let them know when we get to Japan.”
“So… you’re gonna move in with me?”
“Of course… where else could I go?”
“Realise we have never really lived together before?”
“Yeah… so?”
“Well… since it’s MY place… I’m gonna have the final say in everything.”
“Hey, that’s not fair!”
“Yes it’s fair… don’t you try and be your overbearing self in MY house…”
“Did you just say I was overbearing?”
“Well, you are…”
“No, I’m not…”
“Yes, you are… stop denying…”
“I’m not denying… I’m just not!”
“Can’t hear you!”
“Park Yoochun!”
As the bickering went on and on in the otherwise quiet plane cabin, it would seem funny to whomever walked past the pair, that even though they were arguing, their hands were tightly intertwined with each other’s.
From then… till forever.
THE END
Author's notes: Oh my... this is the end... My first completed loooong fic.... haha... Just wanna say THANK YOU to those who have followed through from beginning to end, those who joined halfway... ALL who left comments on my work. Though a lot of things did not turn out the way I had planned in my head... but this is what writing is all about I guess. I had fun writing this. Hope all of you had fun reading it too! I hope you guys like the ending! ^_^
Chapter 36
The loud bang was still ringing in Junsu’s ears. He was getting a headache from the ringing. It took him a few seconds to register some loud shouting and sounds of things being turned over.
“JUNSU, RUN!”
Junsu’s eyes snapped open at that voice.
Yoochun’s voice.
Junsu’s sight was blurred from shutting his eyes too tightly but he could make out the outline of two figures struggling with one another.
“Yoochun!”
Junsu could not help but shout out. Yoochun came. Yoochun showed up. Junsu hadn’t the slightest idea what that meant, but he knew he felt happy. Despite the situation he was in, Junsu found himself relieved and happy at the fact that Yoochun appeared. Or maybe he was just glad to see the other man again.
Yoochun arrived just in time to push Kang-In away, causing his shot to miss Junsu. The push caused Kang-In to drop his weapon and Yoochun took the chance to attack and to hold the other man down.
“Run, you idiot! Get out of – Argh!”
Kang-In overpowered Yoochun’s hold on him and threw a punch into the taller man’s face. Yoochun fell over from the impact and it was Kang-In’s turn to tower over him, still throwing punches in his face.
Junsu finally found the feeling in his body as he quickly stood up and hopped over to where the other two men were. He then threw his body weight on Kang-In to push him away from Yoochun.
Kang-In let out a shout as the air was knocked out of him from the sudden weight. Junsu landed hardly on the ground together with Kang-In while Yoochun was still recovering from the punches threw into his face.
“Bad move, Kim Junsu!”
Kang-In cursed as he got up and made his way over to where Junsu was lying on the ground. With all his limbs tied up, Junsu could barely sit up before he felt Kang-In’s hands on his collar, pulling him to his feet.
“Let’s end this NOW!”
Kang-In shouted as he encircled his hands around Junsu’s neck and started strangling him like a mad man.
“JUNSU! NO!”
Yoochun’s cry echoed through the warehouse as he grabbed the nearest thing he got his hands on and made for Kang-In.
“Argh!”
Yoochun shouted as he swung the wooden plank at Kang-In. He continued to ram the plank into the other’s face until he let go of Junsu. The tied up man collapsed and was having a coughing fit from the momentary air cut-off. Yoochun continued to attack the bigger man with the plank until Kang-In fell and was rolling on the ground.
Seeing that Kang-In was making no move to get up, Yoochun wasted no time and quickly ran back to where Junsu was.
“Junsu! You alright?”
He asked as he quickly undid the ropes on Junsu’s limbs. Junsu still felt weak from the strangling and could not answer Yoochun’s question.
“Quick, get up! Let’s get out of here!”
“Be… behind!”
BANG!
“Argh!”
“YOOCHUN!”
Junsu shouted out loud as he watched Yoochun collapse to the ground. Blood was starting to ooze from the wound on his leg.
In a distance, Kim Kang-In was laughing shamelessly with the revolver in his hand. He got up unsteadily, with blood flowing down the sides of his head from the wounds inflicted by Yoochun earlier and inched his way slowly towards the two men with the weapon pointed at them.
Yoochun tried in vain to stand as Junsu was trying to pull him up.
“Run, Junsu. Go now!”
“No… I cannot leave you… I can’t…”
“Hahaha! You’re not so cocky now, are you Park Yoochun!”
BANG!
“NO! STOP!”
Junsu shouted as Kang-In fired another shot and hit Yoochun’s shoulder.
“FUCK YOU, KIM KANG-IN!”
Yoochun shouted as he bit his lower lip to endure the seething pain that was spreading through his leg and shoulder. He knew they had to do something before Kim Kang-In killed them both.
“Hyung… STOP please! Stop shooting!”
Junsu pleaded as he moved to shield Yoochun from any more shots.
“I told you, Junsu… I will torture your lover in front of you before I KILL you before his eyes!”
“You sick bastard! Go fuck yourself!”
Yoochun snapped stubbornly as he tried to move Junsu away from shielding him. He could feel his heart beating wildly against his chest. He had to do something. He had to do something quick.
Kang-In continued to laugh menacingly as he inched nearer and nearer to the pair on the ground, Yoochun’s blood already staining the floor around them.
“Junsu, make a run for it. Don’t plead with him… just go!”
Yoochun said desperately, but Junsu refused to budge.
“Hear the lovebirds go! You have no idea how much the two of you disgust me!”
Kang-In finally reached the pair on the ground as he lowered the gun to Junsu’s head.
Junsu stared back stubbornly as he felt the cold metal against his forehead. His heart was pounding wildly too.
Yoochun’s eyes widened as he started to breathe heavily.
“You will go first, Kim Junsu, then Park Yoochun will join you shortly after. Give me a day and you will see your parents and your half brothers in hell with you!”
Junsu just continued to stare hard at Kim Kang-In even though his eyes were brimming with tears from the thought that his family would not be spared.
“NO! NO! STOP!”
Yoochun yelled as he struggled to stand up but his legs just kept giving way. At that moment, his hands felt something behind him.
“Park Yoochun… before you die… let me just tell you that… your old man is dead… I killed him… the day he supposedly went missing…”
“Wha…”
Yoochun could not utter the word as tears began to cloud his vision.
“Yes… I did it… he forced me to… when he told me to get you back to run the organization… even when I was standing right in front of him… even though I worked my ass off for him… he still wanted a useless bum like you to run the organization… everything I did was for NOTHING!”
Tears were starting to flow down Yoochun’s cheeks. His father wanted him back. His father did care about him. But he was not there for his old man. He did not even get to see him one last time.
“Tell me…. Park Yoochun… Kim Junsu… why should I always deserve less compared to the both of you… when I do so much more… and try so much harder? How am I different from you two? I cannot take this lying down… I can’t…”
“Hyung…”
Junsu uttered out, finally understanding Kang-In’s reasons for all that he had done. It was not entirely his fault. It was the people around him that were partly responsible for the hatred he had.
“Don’t give me those pitiful eyes! I don’t need your sympathy! I don’t want your sympathy! I just want to get rid of you both… to get back at the people who let me down!”
Kang-In’s eyes hardened as he cocked the gun against Junsu’s head.
“Farewell, Kim Junsu…”
“NO!”
Yoochun shouted as he flung the thing he held in his hand at Kang-In. It hit Kang-In in the head and the big man fell backwards from the impact, dropping his gun towards Yoochun.
Yoochun acted out of anger as he picked up the gun and pushed himself up, ignoring the pain he was feeling in his leg. He breathed out hard as he pointed the gun at Kang-In who was lying on the floor.
“No… Yoochun! Don’t!”
Junsu scrambled towards Yoochun. He did not want Yoochun to become a murderer, neither does he want Kim Kang-In dead. The man was after all his brother.
“Yoochun, please don’t! I beg of you!”
Yoochun’s hand was shaking as he pointed the armed weapon at his father’s murderer. But he also knew the man was Junsu’s brother. He owed Junsu too much to take away his brother’s life. Yet, he could not bring himself to put down the gun once he thought about how Kang-In killed both his father and brother.
“Yoochun! Put down the gun, please! Let the police handle him… you don’t have to kill him… You cannot kill him…”
Yoochun clenched his teeth as he struggled with the turmoil in his heart. If he killed Kim Kang-In, Junsu would hate him forever. But if he did not, he did not know if he could live with himself.
Junsu was almost in tears as Yoochun still made no move to put down the gun. Kang-In was still out from the impact on his head but Junsu could see that he was coming to very soon.
“Chun… I love you…”
Yoochun’s eyes widened as he turned to face Junsu.
Junsu gave a slight smile.
“I do… I really do… I realised it when you left the hospital… I was unsure about you and Eunhyuk initially… but when I saw you leave… when you told me you did not love me… I finally figured out who I really wanted to be with. It’s you.”
Yoochun’s eyes softened.
“Despite all that you did… I found myself willing to forgive you and be with you. Please, Chun… if you pull that trigger… we can never be together. It would not matter what both of us want anymore… It would be impossible for us to be with each other. Please put the gun down. For me… for us…”
Yoochun looked once from Junsu to Kang-In. Kang-In had regained consciousness and was staring hard at Yoochun and Junsu as he held his hand on his bleeding head.
Junsu reached his hand out slowly to place it on both the weapon and Yoochun’s hand around it. Gently and slowly, Yoochun allowed Junsu to push the weapon down and away from Kang-In.
“Go mal-wo…”
Junsu whispered. Yoochun gave a slight smile.
“Kim Kang-In… you may have suffered more than both of us… but you made those decisions to hurt other people. You turned yourself into a monster… not us… You only have yourself to blame.”
“NO! NO! It’s not my fault! It’s not my fault!”
“JUNSU!”
Kang-In was too fast for the two men, who thought he was injured. Kang-In grabbed Junsu and from his back pocket, took out a knife and held it to Junsu’s neck.
“Hyung… why can’t you understand? You would not feel better after hurting us… you wouldn’t!”
“Shut up! I don’t need you to tell me what to do!”
“Let Junsu go, Kang-In…or I will shoot!”
Yoochun held up the revolver again and pointed it at Kang-In. But he knew he could jolly well hit Junsu instead.
“Ha… you just try and shoot, Park Yoochun… let’s see who you will hit!”
“No, Yoochun! Don’t hurt him, please!”
“Junsu, he wants to kill you! He doesn’t care if you’re his brother!”
“But I do… don’t hurt him… even if he kills me… don’t hurt him!”
“No… No! Kang-In, let Junsu go now!”
“Take your chance, Park Yoochun! If you have the guts, just shoot! If you don’t shoot, I will kill Kim Junsu. I’ll count to 3.”
“NO! Kim Kang-In, you bastard, let Junsu go!”
“Yoochun, don’t shoot! Don’t!”
“3…”
“LET HIM GO!”
“Don’t shoot, Yoochun! Please don’t!”
“2…”
“Hyung… stop this… please…”
“KIM KANG-IN! Let Junsu go NOW!”
“1…”
“NO!”
BANG!
***
He opened his eyes slowly but had to shut it again due to the bright lights. He forced himself to open his eyes again and this time it was better. He could hear beeping sounds and a sudden pain reminded him of his injured shoulder.
Then he caught sight of another figure sitting by his bed.
“Su…?”
Yoochun said hoarsely, his throat dry. He wondered how long he was out. More importantly, he needed to talk to Junsu.
The other man just sat, not moving, an unreadable expression in his eyes. Yoochun could not decide if it was regret, or sadness, or despair. Whatever it was, it was not good. He knew it could not be good the moment he decided to pull the trigger. He pulled it only because he knew he would hit Kang-In.
And he did.
As Yoochun tried to sit up, he noticed that Junsu was staring at him.
“Su… I…”
“Yoochun…”
Junsu’s voice was disturbingly calm. Yoochun fell silent but Junsu did not continue. The silence in the room was deafening.
“Yoochun… have you ever loved me? Or… do you love me? Was what we had real? I need to hear it from you.”
Yoochun was a little taken aback as that was not what he expected from Junsu. He licked his lips before he spoke.
“I do love you… I always have… What we had was as real as it felt… When I said all those things to you at the hospital… I thought it was the right thing to do… I thought… I’ll support your choice… I… I thought your choice was Eunhyuk… And I did not expect you to forgive me for what I caused Yunho… I…”
“Yoochun…”
Junsu cut Yoochun off again. The injured man just sat and stared at the younger man. Junsu’s eyes had lost their life. He was unshaven and he looked like he had not slept in days. Yoochun’s heart ached.
Junsu raised his head to look straight at Yoochun.
He then leaned in to kiss him.
Yoochun was shocked for a split second, but he could not describe how much Junsu’s kiss meant to him at that moment. He deepened the kiss and brought his free hand to encircle around Junsu’s back. Yoochun was almost lost in heaven as he felt the warmth in Junsu’s mouth spread into his.
But he froze when he tasted something salty.
Junsu was crying.
Yoochun pushed Junsu away gently and the other let him. True enough, Junsu’s face was smeared with tears.
“Junsu… I’m so sorry… I did not mean to…”
“Don’t apologise… I know you did what you did only to protect me… I know… Kang-In probably deserved it anyway…”
Yoochun opened his mouth but closed it again as he did not know what he could say to make things better. He knew family meant a lot to Junsu. Even if the person was Kim Kang-In.
“But… but… what I said at the warehouse… about you… about Kang-In… about us…”
Junsu finally broke into uncontrollable sobs.
Tears were starting to roll down Yoochun’s cheeks too.
He understood what Junsu was trying to say.
They could never be together now.
Never.
Yoochun reached over to pull Junsu into his arms. Even if it was the last time, Yoochun still wanted to feel Junsu in his arms. He needed to feel it… for the last time.
Junsu leaned in weakly, needing to feel the same thing because he knew he would not be able to get himself to feel it again.
Both men sobbed in despair as they stayed in each other’s arms.
“Let me go now, Yoochun… or I will lose myself… I will… I’ve lost everything… I’m going to lose you… I cannot afford to lose myself too…”
When long enough had past, Junsu whispered in between sobs into Yoochun’s ears, desperation in his voice.
Yoochun closed his eyes, causing more tears to escape. He bit his lips as he forced himself to let go. It was the only thing he could do for Junsu now.
Junsu sniffed as he wiped his tears away though fresh ones were still threatening to fall. He swallowed as he looked at Yoochun lovingly, but in a way that meant farewell.
“Take care of yourself, Yoochun… Thank you for everything… Thank you for loving me… and showing me how to trust again… I’ll always remember you.”
Yoochun was trying his best to hold back his tears but it only made him cry more.
Junsu looked up briefly to stop his tears from spilling before he stood up from the chair. Giving Yoochun one last look, he forced a smile before he turned to walk away.
Yoochun stopped himself from yelling for Junsu. He had to let him go. There was no way they could be together now. Was there really no way?
“Junsu! Do we really have to end this way? Is there really no other way?”
Yoochun could not control himself and just had to give one last try.
Junsu stopped in his tracks. He turned around slowly with red puffy eyes.
“Until the day I am not Kim Junsu… and you are not Park Yoochun… we can never be together…”
Both men looked intensely at each other.
Junsu broke the silence.
“Perhaps we really shouldn’t have started… we really shouldn’t have met… but… I don’t regret it at all… However… I’m afraid this is how it has to end…”
Yoochun’s lips were quivering as tears spilt from his eyes.
“Farewell, Kim Junsu… I’ll always remember you too.”
One tear rolled down Junsu’s cheek as he smiled and closed the door to the ward behind him.
Chapter 35
“Changmin!”
“Yoochun hyung! Jaejoong hyung!”
Yoochun ran quickly to reach the younger man. Jaejoong was following closely behind him. The older man was worried about his dongsaeng and insisted on coming with him. Hyesung met up with Minwoo and was working with the police on tracking where Kim Kang-In could be.
“Where is your hyung? Where is Junsu?”
“I… I don’t know Yoochun hyung… after you called me I tried to look for him and call him… but I could not find him anywhere…”
Yoochun was panting from the running, as well as from the anxiety he was feeling. Kim Kang-In would surely come for Junsu… That bastard surely will. They had to find Junsu before he did.
“Let’s go look around some more… He must still be in the hospital!”
Yoochun, Changmin and Jaejoong were about to move off when Eunhyuk appeared around the corner.
“Eunhyuk hyung… did you see Junsu hyung?”
The small man looked up and he gave Yoochun a dirty look once their gaze met.
“I was speaking to him a while ago… what’s the matter?”
“Where is he now? Tell me! Please tell me!”
Yoochun grabbed Eunhyuk at his sides and this did not make the latter too happy about it.
“Get off me, you fool! I don’t know where Junsu is!”
“You have to know! You just said you were with him!”
“Well, we went our separate ways after that! Just let me go!”
Eunhyuk finally shook Yoochun’s hold on him off. But Yoochun only got more frustrated and without thinking, he threw a punch into Eunhyuk’s face for the second time that day.
“What the fuck did you do that for!”
“Yoochun! Stop!”
Jaejoong shouted as he pulled Yoochun back from hitting Eunhyuk further.
“Junsu’s life is in danger! Kim Kang-In has escaped and is probably hunting Junsu down now as we speak! Why didn’t you stay with him! You were supposed to watch him!”
Eunhyuk’s face dropped as he processed what Yoochun said. But it was also the look in Yoochun’s eyes that sent a chill down the other man’s spine.
Yoochun struggled out of Jaejoong’s hold and immediately made for Eunhyuk’s collars.
“Where and when did you last see Junsu? Think and tell us NOW!”
Eunhyuk was breathing heavily as he stuttered.
“I… We… we were talking at the… um… at the hospital’s main entrance… but… Junsu wanted to be alone… so he took off… I saw him… walk out of the hospital… but I could not see which direction he went…”
Yoochun flung off his hold on Eunhyuk’s collars and sprinted in the direction of the hospital’s main entrance. Jaejoong ran quickly after him and Changmin followed close behind.
Eunhyuk could only stand and stare at the disappearing back of the three men, especially that of Park Yoochun’s.
“I now know why you love him more than me Junsu… I finally understand…”
***
Yoochun’s throat and body was burning from all the running but he could not stop until he was sure Junsu was safe and sound. He should not have left Junsu’s side. He should have stayed. He hated himself very much at that moment. He hated himself for coming up with that stupid plan. He hated himself for getting Yunho hurt.
But most of all, he hated himself for hurting Junsu and making the other man think that he did not love him. He wished he could just kill himself.
Yoochun ran like a mad man around the nearby areas of the hospital. He, Changmin and Jaejoong decided to split up and search. Changmin and Jaejoong were searching the hospital building.
It’s been almost half an hour and they still have no traces of the man. Junsu would not have gone far. Why couldn’t they find him?
Unless…
RING!
“Yul bo se yo?”
Yoochun answered frantically, without even checking who the caller was.
“Park Yoochun…”
Yoochun could feel all colour drain from his own face.
“Kim Junsu is with me now…”
“Yah, Kim Kang-In! Don’t you dare hurt Junsu! Or else…”
“Hahaha… If you wanna save your little lover… come meet me… alone… I will put a bullet through Kim Junsu’s head if you bring company. I will not hesitate, Park Yoochun… you know what I am capable of… Meet me at the warehouse.”
Click.
“Ki…”
Yoochun did not manage to say another word before Kim Kang-In hung up on him. Without waiting another second, the man made his way to the car.
“I’m coming, Junsu… I’m coming…”
***
“Let me go now, Kim Kang-In! What did you call Park Yoochun for?! LET ME GO!”
Kim Kang-In turned in the direction of the shouting man as he flipped his phone shut.
“What? Worried about your lover? Don’t worry… you will see him very soon… and I will make him pay… for thwarting my plans… He thinks he can destroy me like that… well… he is wrong… and I will make him pay… I will make you BOTH pay…”
Kim Junsu stared at Kim Kang-In with a murderous look in his eyes. He wanted some fresh air and so he went out of the hospital building, only to be ambushed by the nutcase and brought to the abandoned warehouse again. Junsu hated the sense of déjà vu. Both his arms and legs are tied up and he was left sitting on the ground.
“I will not let you off for what you did to Yunho hyung… I will get my hands on you eventually!”
Kim Kang-In only responded with a sickening laugh that resounded through the empty place.
“Kim Junsu… you really amaze me… you are seated there, all tied up… what makes you think what you say would have any effect on me… you just making this even better for me…”
“If you wanna kill me, Kim Kang-In, just do it then! I’ve had enough of you!”
Kim Kang-In turned serious so suddenly that Junsu flinched inwardly.
“I will kill you, Kim Junsu… you have no idea… how much I wish to do that now… but I’ve got an even better idea… I shall let you watch while I torture your little lover… before letting you die… right before Park Yoochun’s eyes…”
Junsu saw the hate in Kang-In’s eyes and could not understand where it all came from.
“What have I ever done to you, huh? Or my family for this matter, that you hate us so much?”
“Hahaha… I forgot… you are the lucky and fortunate one… you grew up without having to worry about someone beating you up in the middle of your sleep, such that you barely even slept… you grew up without having to worry about having no food to eat because you do not have to bother about losing a fight for the limited food… YOU GREW UP without knowing how it felt like to sleep out on the roads in winter because you have a roof over your head… I hate you… Kim Junsu…. Because you did not go through what I had to go through…”
“You’re crazy! Most people did not go through what you went through! How many people could you go after?”
“You’re different from them… Kim Junsu… because the same blood runs in our body… and yet you got to lead a life of luxury while I had to fend for myself… this is exactly why I want you, Kim Choi Won and the rest of the Kim family… penniless… and dead…”
“Wha…? What did you just say?”
“Yes… you heard me right… dongsaeng… we’re brothers… but why must I be the one to lead the hard life… while you get to enjoy all the good things? So I want to take back what is mine… everything… everything that was yours should have been mine too! Since that is not possible now… I will take away the one thing that is important to them… YOU… I want them to know how it feels to lose EVERYTHING!”
Junsu could only stare at Kang-In’s face. Could it be that they were actually brothers? How was that possible? Everything was too over-whelming for the tied-up man that he did not know what to think.
“Surprised? Well, go ask Kim Choi Won and your precious mother why they abandoned me! Why did they choose you over me! Why I had to fend for myself while you are cared for by so many people!”
“If… if we are family… how could you bear to hurt us? How could you be out to destroy us?”
“Why should I care or bother about the fact that we are family when Kim Choi Won and YOUR precious mother did not bother when they abandoned me! I swore, the day I found out, that I would get back all that I deserved… all that the Kim family owes me!”
Junsu felt weak as he stared at the man standing before him. He could not believe they were related by blood. He could not accept the fact that his parents abandoned their own flesh and blood.
“I had everything planned out… I even managed to get Jung Yunho to help me… I almost got all I wanted… But Park Yoochun had to thwart my plans… I really underestimated him… I thought he could be overlooked… But I was wrong… But it’s okay… because I’m going to let him have a taste of losing what is precious to him... one… more… time…”
Kim Kang-In laughed shamelessly.
Junsu just sat where he was, staring at nothing in particular. How did things come to this end? How did so many things happen in just a few months? He was finally able to let go of his past and was determined to make things work with Yoochun, only to suffer worse consequences. Yoochun had caused his brother to be blinded and him to lose his family business. And after all that, he had to find out that Yoochun never loved him. Now, his own blood brother just wanted to kill him and his family.
Junsu had no more strength left in him. He did not want to fight back anymore. It would please Kang-In if he only knew that Junsu’s world had already crumbled. It did not really make a difference to the young man whether he lived or died. Since this is something his parents owed Kim Kang-In, he would repay the debt for them.
“You’re wrong about one thing, brother…”
Kang-In stopped laughing and frowned at the calmness of Junsu’s voice.
“Park Yoochun is not going to come… if you wanna kill me… just do it now…”
The other man just smirked.
“Don’t try and be a hero now, Kim Junsu. I will kill you eventually… but since I can make this more painful for you… trust me when I say I will make use of this opportunity fully… You and Park Yoochun make such a disgusting couple that I feel like bashing you two up even if I didn’t know you…”
Junsu merely let out a mocking laugh.
“It would probably please you to know that Park Yoochun was with me purely to get revenge at you… He said it himself… right after you were arrested… he had no reason to lie to me… I have already been hit where it hurts the most… and I cannot feel anymore… it does not make a difference now… whether you kill me or not… But if you think it would help to alleviate your hate and make you feel better… then do it.”
Kang-In looked confused and did not know what to believe. He just starred on at Kim Junsu, hoping that an answer would come to him.
“But I hope you could promise me… that you would not hurt anyone else… Mother is already in a bad state… Yunho hyung has already been punished and Changmin never did anything to you… Please let everything end with my death.”
Kim Kang-In tightened his hold on the gun.
“It’s not that simple, Kim Junsu. Life for me was never that simple… life for me was never easy… nothing I did was ever enough to give me a proper life. I did not have enough to eat… to wear… I did not ask for a lot… I just wanted enough for me to lead a decent life… but I never had enough… while YOU… you had more of everything… I’m sure you had more than enough to eat… more than enough to wear… and perhaps even more than enough space to sleep! You would never… NEVER be able to understand what I went through… so don’t act all noble now and think things would just end with your death… I know what you’re trying to do… you’re trying to save Park Yoochun’s ass… Even if he does not appear… I will still kill him, Kim Junsu… then you would know how it feels like to have NOTHING!”
Kim Kang-In clenched his teeth tightly as he finished. He did not care if Kim Junsu is deliberately seeking death, or just trying to save his lover. He had come too far to stop. He had done too much damage to give up. He had no choice but to continue with his plan. It was the only thing that made sense to him since he found out his parentage. The Kim family owed him everything they had. He had no more conscience left to consider that he was related to Kim Junsu by blood. He had given up too much to give in to his conscience now. He hardened his heart and pointed his gun at Kim Junsu’s head.
Junsu’s heart froze at the look in Kang-In’s eyes. The former realised Kang-In had too much hatred in him to see any more sense. The younger man knew Kang-In would not stop until his whole family was dead.
“Hyung…”
“Don’t call me THAT!”
Kim Kang-In shouted as he pushed the nozzle of the gun against Junsu’s forehead.
Junsu swallowed. He was not afraid to die. He was not lying to Kang-In when he said it would not make a difference if he was dead or alive. But he did not want to die for nothing. He must make sure Kang-In did not hurt his family members.
“Go back to the Kim family after my death. Once I am dead, Father and Mother would only have you as their son. They will take you back into the family. I’m sure they will.”
“SHUT THE FUCK UP before I blow your brains out!”
“You don’t have to kill them. Please, hyung… I beg of you!”
Kang-In was clenching his teeth and squeezing the weapon in his hand. Junsu knew he was probably courting his own death by aggravating Kang-In but it was the only thing that was on his mind with the gun pointed in his face.
“I mean it, Kim Junsu! You’d better shut your trap if you still wanna live!”
“You can kill me… take my life…. Do whatever you want… but just promise me you would not hurt my family or Yoochun!”
“You got that right… it’s YOUR family… not MINE… they owe me too much… even though I failed to get back what I deserve… I’m going to hit them where it hurts the most… you… their ONLY son… and Park Yoochun’s precious lover…”
Junsu could already feel his heart beating wildly against his chest. He could feel his end coming. Somehow, he could feel that Kang-In was going to pull the trigger any time. But he had not gotten the assurance he needed. He was running out of time.
“NO! They are your family too! They are your parents, your brothers! You’ve hurt them enough, don’t hurt them anymore!”
“What about the hurt they inflicted on me? Did they think about the fact that I was related to them before they abandoned me? HUH?!”
“They must have a good reason… they must have… and you would never know the reason if you kill them!”
“Ha… I don’t need any reason anymore… No reason can justify the kind of life I have had to lead because of them… No reason… Forget it, Kim Junsu… Nothing you say will change your fate… or theirs… not anymore… it’s all too late…”
Kang-In indicated the end of the conversation by cocking the gun and letting the sound echoed through the empty warehouse.
Junsu was panting from the shouting but mostly from the anxiety he was feeling inside of him. He let out short breaths as his perspiration dripped off the sides of his face. He found himself looking straight into the nozzle of the gun again. The sight was getting too familiar for his liking.
Junsu closed his eyes slowly as he gave up any more struggle. He was too tired and too hurt to fight on anymore. He did not want to anymore. He had no more reason to.
As he shut his eyes completely, Yoochun’s face appeared in front of him. A single tear rolled down his cheek.
BANG!
Genre: Drama
Pairing: Yoosu
Story: Park Yoochun has a dark past he stashed away. Kim Junsu has a painful love he wants to forget. They hate each other's guts when they first meet yet Fate has it that they stay in each other's present. But what holds for their future?
Disclaimers: I don't own the characters.
Warning: Vulgar language
Author's notes: Sorry for taking a whole month!!! I was kinda stuck... Anyways... hope you guys still rem this story!!! Here's the next chap!!! Thanks for all your comments on the previous one! ^_^
[chapter 1] [chapter 2] [chapter 3+4] [chapter 5] [chapter 6] [chapter 7+8] [chapter 9] [chapter 10] [chapter 11] [chapter 12] [chapter 13] [chapter 14] [chapter 15] [chapter 16+17] [chapter 18] [chapter 19] [chapter 20] [chapter 21] [chapter 22] [chapter 23] [chapter 24] [chapter 25] [chapter 26] [chapter 27] [chapter 28] [chapter 29] [chapter 30] [chapter 31] [chapter 32] [chapter 33]
Chapter 34
Park Yoochun did not know how long or far he had walked since he left the hospital. His legs were aching from all the walking but he had not stopped. His eyes were tired from all the crying but his tears were still flowing.
Junsu did not rebut him when he asked if he still loved Eunhyuk. Surely, Junsu would have said something if Yoochun mattered to him.
But he didn’t.
Yoochun knew in his heart that could not be a good thing. Not for him anyway. Eunhyuk probably left for a good reason and if Junsu did not have something going on with Yoochun, he might have happily accepted his ex lover again. Yoochun realised he had become a third party.
He was sure Junsu would not forgive him. Not after what he had done to Yunho. Not after how he had caused Junsu to lose the entire company. He did not know how to face Junsu anymore.
Yoochun did the only thing that came to his mind at that moment.
Make Junsu hate him.
He had to make Junsu hate him so much that he would not feel guilty about getting back with Eunhyuk. It only made sense that Junsu have stronger feelings for his ex lover. He and Yoochun only just started. Even if Junsu did feel hurt by Yoochun’s actions, Eunhyuk would be able to make it better. Since Kim Kang-In was taken care of already, Yoochun could make an exit from Junsu’s life. He only managed to screw it up the moment he appeared and he would only be screwing up Junsu’s life further if he did not leave.
Yet, Yoochun was not as brave as he hoped himself to be.
He realised he could not do without Junsu. He was lost. He had no idea what to do with himself anymore.
That was why since he left the hospital, he only knew to walk far, far away from the man he loved. He told himself he could not stop. He told himself he could not turn back. He could feel his sanity hanging by a thin line. But it did not matter to Yoochun anymore if he did go crazy again. Without Junsu by his side, nothing else made sense anyway.
“Yoochun!”
Yoochun heard his name but he kept telling himself he could not stop walking. He had to get far, far away from Junsu. He had to.
“YOOCHUN! Stop! It’s me! Jaejoong!”
Jaejoong panted as he finally caught up with his dongsaeng. His heart broke when he faced the taller man. Yoochun’s eyes were all puffy and red, his face smeared with tears, dried and fresh ones, and there seemed to be no more life left in him.
“Yoochun? Chunnie… it’s your Jae hyung… I looked all over for you… Shall we go home?”
Jaejoong cooed like a mother as he cupped Yoochun’s face in his hands. He rushed to the hospital when he heard what had happened at Kim Enterprises and knew straight away that his silly dongsaeng must have planned it. He also knew how angry Junsu must be at Yoochun.
When he reached the hospital, he saw Junsu, Changmin and another man he could not recognise. Changmin was not able to tell him much except that Yoochun was at the hospital earlier and that Junsu and Yoochun had a huge fight before the latter left. Jaejoong then decided to drive around the area to search for his dongsaeng.
From how his dongsaeng looked, it must have been more than a huge fight. He shook his dongsaeng gently when he realised Yoochun was not looking at him at all.
“Chunnie, it’s me… please don’t scare me… please say something…”
Yoochun’s eyes finally focused on Jaejoong and as soon as the taller man recognised his hyung, he just threw himself into Jaejoong’s arms.
“Hyung… I hurt Junsu… I hurt him so bad… I’ve lost him… he’ll never forgive me… he’ll never want to see me again… I don’t know what else to do…”
Jaejoong could not make out anything else as Yoochun started to grab harder and sob into his shoulders as he shook uncontrollably. Jaejoong could feel his heart break again.
“Let’s get you home first. “
***
“Keep an eye on Yunho hyung, Changmin… I need a breath of fresh air…”
Junsu said quietly as he stood up to leave the ward.
Changmin watched as his younger hyung exited the room. When he arrived at the hospital, Junsu was crying and kneeling on the floor. The tall man was shocked and he nearly choked when he saw Eunhyuk with his hyung. When the youngest approached the man on the floor, Junsu simply leaned into Changmin’s arms and continued sobbing. They stayed like that for a long time before Junsu finally stopped. And he had not uttered a word up till that moment. Changmin only managed to find out from Eunhyuk that Junsu had a huge fight with Yoochun. But the other man seemed to find it difficult to explain to the youngest what exactly happened.
Changmin did not know what to think. Everything was getting a little too complicated for him. He only knew Yoochun hyung did something to Kim Enterprises and really hurt Junsu when he met Jaejoong and found out what happened. It was not good that Eunhyuk was back too.
He just wished everything would turn out well for everyone in the end. He sighed as he reached over to Yunho and swept some hair away from the man’s eyes.
***
“Junsu?”
The said man did not move from his position with his head down but his eyes snapped open when he heard Eunhyuk’s voice. He then felt a weight beside him settle into the couch he was sitting on.
“Coffee?”
Junsu merely shook his head.
Eunhyuk cleared his throat before he spoke again.
“Are you alright?”
A long pause ensued and Eunhyuk wondered if Junsu even heard him.
“No…”
Junsu choked slightly on his soft answer.
Eunhyuk’s gaze darted to the man beside him. When Junsu did not revoke Yoochun’s question about how he felt about Eunhyuk, the man wondered if maybe the smaller man still had feelings for him. Now that Kim Kang-In was arrested, he did not have to hide anymore. Eunhyuk could be with Junsu if the other man still wanted him.
“Are you still upset over what Park Yoochun said?”
Junsu kept silent.
“You don’t have to bother about what he says, Junsu… he’s an asshole… he should not have made use of you to get his revenge.”
“Don’t go on…. Hyuk…”
“I just want you to know that… I’ll be here for you. I’m back now and I’m going to take care of you.”
“No…”
Eunhyuk looked over at Junsu and wondered what the other man meant by that.
“You cannot make things better, Eunhyuk… not this time…”
The shorter man realised Junsu had started crying again when he saw the tear-streaked face staring back at him with sadness so deep, Eunhyuk could feel his own heart twist.
“I cannot do this right now… please just leave me alone…”
Junsu said in his hoarse voice as he stood up to leave.
“Junsu wait… please… let me help you… let me make your sadness go away…”
“Eunhyuk… I mean it… let me be alone… I cannot talk to you now…”
Junsu rebutted, more sternly this time as he struggled to lose the other man’s hold on him.
“You never liked talking about your troubles, but you always share them with me… it’ll be like old times… C’mon…”
“LET GO OF ME!”
Junsu shouted this time, unable to contain his frustrations anymore. Eunhyuk moved back a few steps from Junsu’s push and also from shock.
“You don’t understand! We cannot go back to how it used to be anymore! You cannot make my sadness go away like you used to anymore! Things have changed, Eunhyuk… you may have left for a good reason but truth is… you left… and I was alone.”
Eunhyuk could not bear to see Junsu so heart-broken. He really wanted to show his care and love for the other man. But he could see it in Junsu’s eyes now. He was no longer the one who could tend to Junsu’s wounds anymore.
Junsu sobbed quietly as he sank down into a nearby seat, physically drained by all that had happened.
“When you told me the real reason you left… I was very confused. I was all ready to move on and leave you behind, Eunhyuk. And I don’t deny… it is all because of Yoochun. But when I saw you… when I heard your side of the story, I did not know what to do…”
Eunhyuk could feel his eyes burning up at the sight of Junsu in despair.
“Up till the moment I was arguing with Yoochun… I still had no idea what I was feeling… what I really wanted… I am upset with him… of course I am… but that does not mean I lost my love for him. But yet… I could not let your sacrifice for me to be for nothing.”
“But you already know he was only with you for revenge… Forget him… I’m back now… let me be with you now…”
Junsu raised his head to look up at nothing in particular as tears flowed freely down his cheeks.
“I can’t… can’t forget him, Hyuk… I only realised the moment he said he cared more about revenge than he did about me that… that… “
Junsu could not continue.
“What, Su? What did you realise?”
Junsu let out a long breath.
“I realised… that I… really love him… I love Yoochun, Hyuk… more than I ever loved you… Mi an hae… but my heart is dead now… It died when Yoochun’s love for me… died…”
***
“Yoochun?”
Jaejoong said gently when he saw that his dongsaeng was stirring. Yoochun cried in his arms for a long while before he finally calmed down and let his hyung bring him home. But since he stopped crying, it was as if he had stopped feeling too. He did not speak, he did not move and he just stared into space. Jaejoong was afraid his sickness might be acting up and quickly fed him his medication before making the younger man sleep.
“Chunnie… are you feeling better? Can you recognise me?”
The only response Jaejoong got was a pair of lifeless eyes staring back at him.
“Yoochun… you know I would worry for you… seeing you like this… please say something… please… I’m begging you…”
“Junsu…”
The older man let out a long sigh.
“I don’t know what happened between the two of you… so talk to me and let me help you.”
“I need to get far, far away from Junsu, hyung… I have to… He’ll never forgive me… Never…”
Jaejoong just nodded wordlessly as he propped Yoochun up on the bed with a pillow. He had to talk this out with his dongsaeng.
“Why were you so silly to have sold Kim Enterprises to Kim Kang-In? You know Junsu would not have agreed to it. And to ask Yunho to spy for you… that’s taking too big a risk… I heard from Changmin he is quite seriously injured.”
Yoochun brought his knees to his chest and curled up like a scared child. Jaejoong decided he had better be careful with his words.
“It’s understandable if Junsu is mad at you now… but that does not mean he’ll never forgive you… I know you must have done it because you thought it was the only way to keep Kim Kang-In from hurting the Kims. Give Junsu some time. He’ll understand eventually.”
Jaejoong smiled encouragingly. He trusted that Junsu really cared for Yoochun and that one day, he would be able to forgive his dongsaeng. Yoochun was probably just imagining too much.
“No hyung… I will never get to see Junsu again… Never…”
Jaejoong furrowed his brows. He was just about to open his mouth and ask when the front door banged open, causing the two men to jump.
“Hyesung hyung! What’s the rush?”
Jaejoong asked with a frown on his face, angry that Hyesung gave them both a scare.
“Yoochun! Where is Junsu?”
“Calm down, hyung… Yoochun just took his medication… He is not very stable right now… Go slow on him…”
“We have no time!”
“What do you mean by that?”
Hyesung ignored Jaejoong and went straight for Yoochun as fast as his limping could go.
“Where is Junsu, Yoochun? Is he safe?”
“I don’t know, hyung… please don’t ask me anything now…”
Yoochun made a move to burrow into his covers so that he could drown out Hyesung’s questioning.
“His life is in danger, damn it! Would you snap out of it!”
Hyesung said forcibly as he stopped his dongsaeng from hiding into the covers.
Yoochun’s eyes widened and at the same time had a confused look on his face.
“What are you talking about, hyung? I don’t understand…”
“Do you know why Kim Kang-In shot Yunho even though he had gotten his hands on the company?”
“He’s a nutcase, hyung… He is capable of anything…”
Jaejoong commented curtly.
“No… he is not a nutcase… haven’t you ever wondered why he was all out to do the Kims in?”
Jaejoong and Yoochun just stared blankly at their hyung, not knowing what to expect.
“Kim Kang-In is one of Kim Choi Won’s many unclaimed sons!”
“What?!”
Jaejoong could not believe what he was hearing. Yoochun just continued to stare.
“Kim Kang-In is angry at the life he had been leading when he could have been living a life of luxury. He hates Kim Choi Won for not doing his duty as a father, and naturally hates Yunho, Changmin and Junsu because they got to lead a better life than he did. He is bent on getting back at the whole family.”
“That would explain why he shot Yunho… he basically wants the whole Kim family dead.”
“But he hates Junsu the most.”
“Why?”
Hyesung paused to think about how to phrase what he wanted to say next. Yoochun could feel his hands turning cold.
“They have the same mother and father… Unlike Yunho and Changmin, who are Junsu’s half brothers, Kim Kang-In and Kim Junsu are blood brothers. So he is resentful of the fact that Junsu grew up with a silver spoon in his mouth, while he was left to grow up alone in an orphanage and had to deal with extreme conditions his whole life.”
“Oh my gosh… this is unbelievable… but how did Kim Kang-In get left behind in the orphanage?”
“I’m not sure. All I found out was Kim Kang-In’s parents are Kim Choi Won and his wife.”
“But hyung, I still don’t understand. Why is Junsu in danger?”
Jaejoong asked with a confused look on his face.
Hyesung eyed his dongsaengs intently. Yoochun immediately had a bad feeling.
“I just got word from Minwoo… that Kim Kang-In has escaped.”
Rating: NC-16 (vulgar language)
Genre: Drama
Pairing: Yoosu
Story: Park Yoochun has a dark past he stashed away. Kim Junsu has a painful love he wants to forget. They hate each other's guts when they first meet yet Fate has it that they stay in each other's present. But what holds for their future?
Disclaimers: I don't own the characters.
Warning: Vulgar language
Author's notes: I tried my best to devise the best plan... haha... not most satisfied but this is the best i could do... heh... probably another 4 or 5 chapters to end. Thanks for all your lovely comments!!! ^_^
[chapter 1] [chapter 2] [chapter 3+4] [chapter 5] [chapter 6] [chapter 7+8] [chapter 9] [chapter 10] [chapter 11] [chapter 12] [chapter 13] [chapter 14] [chapter 15] [chapter 16+17] [chapter 18] [chapter 19] [chapter 20] [chapter 21] [chapter 22] [chapter 23] [chapter 24] [chapter 25] [chapter 26] [chapter 27] [chapter 28] [chapter 29] [chapter 30] [chapter 31] [chapter 32]
Chapter 33
“This was what happened.”
Yunho picked up his coffee to sip on it, indicating that he was finished.
Yoochun exhaled deeply, not knowing what to think.
“Why do you think he is back all of a sudden then?”
“You’re worried now?”
Yunho smirked, slightly amused by Yoochun’s worried expression. But he also noticed the resigned look that replaced it.
“Well… considering what I am about to do to him next…”
Yoochun trailed off, not knowing how to continue.
“To be honest, if I didn’t know better, I would have skinned you alive for doing this to Junsu! I really don’t know how he would react to this, Yoochun. For all you know, he would rather be dead.”
“No… he cannot die… I cannot allow it.”
The words were spoken so softly that Yunho did not know if he imagined it. But he knew he did not the minute his gaze met with Yoochun’s. The other man’s eyes were red and watery.
“I just hope he finds it in him to forgive and trust you again… I think that is the only way for him… and you to get through this…”
Yunho said quietly.
RING!
The loud ringing broke both men’s thoughts and they exchange knowing looks before Yunho answered the call.
“Yul bo se yo?”
“Alright… I’ll come and meet you now.”
Yunho clicked his phone shut.
“Kang-In?”
“Yup… the police just released him and he wants to meet me now… looks like he is eager to get things done and over with.”
“I’m sure he is.”
Yunho paused to look at Yoochun with a solemn expression.
“You are sure about this right? Once I meet up with Kang-In, there will be no turning back for either one of us.”
Yoochun replied with a determined face, his tears already dried up.
“This is the only way to ensure Junsu’s safety… even if it means he would hate me forever… We’ll still have to do it.”
Yunho looked deep into Yoochun’s eyes and he could see sadness. Yoochun has more to lose in this situation than he did, when it came to Junsu. But both men knew this had to be the best plan.
“Alright. You handle your part of the show.”
Yunho said as he stood up from his seat.
“Hyung…?”
Yoochun called quickly after Yunho. The latter turned around.
“Take care alright?”
Yunho gave a slight smile as he turned to walk out the café.
Yoochun sat, still holding the brown package tightly. He pursed his lips together before he took out his mobile again.
“Minwoo hyung… Yoochun here. I have the documents ready. Kim Kang-In is on his way to Kim Enterprises as we speak. I’ll see you there in half an hour’s time.”
Click.
Yoochun let out a long sigh as he leaned back in his seat. Things were going to get ugly and maybe uglier. He stared at his phone for a long time, wondering what reason to give Junsu to explain why he could not meet him at the hospital. He also had to start thinking about how to explain the current situation to the other man so that the hurt would be at a minimum.
RING!
Yoochun nearly dropped his cell when it rang suddenly. He frowned when it showed Junsu’s number.
“Yul bo se yo?”
“Yoochun! I do not have time to explain to you but Yunho is the one working with Kang-In all along. He seems to be planning to do something with Kang-In as we speak so I’m going to the company now. Meet me there!”
“What…. Wait! Junsu!”
Yoochun shouted into the phone but only hearing the dial tone in response. He grabbed the brown package and dashed out of the café. He dialed Junsu’s number again as he started the engine of the car.
“Pick up! Fuck!”
Yoochun cursed out loud when he got Junsu’s mailbox for the third time. He barely missed the bumper of a car in front as he swerved in and out of lanes to get to Kim Enterprises before Junsu does. Things were not supposed to turn out this way. Junsu was not supposed to find out this way.
“Damn it!”
Yoochun threw his phone down as Yunho was not picking up his phone either. If he did not get to Kim Enterprises before Junsu does, and Kang-In found out the older man was working as a spy, Yunho might be in danger too. Yoochun felt like his heart was about to jump out of his body as he floored the accelerator.
***
“As long as you promise not to hurt Changmin, Junsu and Mrs Kim again, I will sign this document and you will hold more than 50% of Kim Enterprises’ shares, thereby making you the greatest shareholder. Both you and I would have achieved our aims.”
Kim Kang-In was sitting opposite Yunho in his office with both his legs on the table. He cleaned his shades in a disinterested manner as he listened to Yunho’s proposition. When Yunho was finally finished, Kang-In looked unconvincingly at the man opposite him as he placed his shades back on his face.
“That’s it? Why didn’t you do this earlier?”
“I only just managed to get the last shareholder to sell me his shares to make up this 51%. You know I want out of this and you know, though I want Kim Choi Won to lose everything, I have always cared for the other members in the Kim family. I never wanted anyone hurt. After what happened with Junsu, I want this to end now. So sign this damn document and I want nothing to do with you. The Kims would have nothing to do with you either.”
Kim Kang-In gave a sickening laugh that echoed in the big office.
“You expect me to believe that the Kims would not come after me after I take over?”
“I can make sure of that. You would be the greatest shareholder. There would be nothing they can do to you.”
“You know, Jung Yunho… you really surprised me this time… being proactive all of a sudden. I really miss the Jung Yunho puppet. Ha… I’m really curious… how did you manage to get Kim Junsu to agree to this?”
“I used his mother to talk him into it. Would you cut your bullshit and just sign on this? Like you would actually care about my brother.”
“You seem eager for me to get this done and over with.”
Kim Kang-In pushed his shades down to look at Yunho from above them.
Yunho could feel his heart pounding in his chest. He had to do something to alleviate Kim Kang-In’s suspicions or his and Yoochun’s efforts would have gone down the drain.
Yunho gave a nonchalant face as he gathered the documents in his hands.
“You were the one who asked to meet me the moment the police let you off. I wonder who was more eager. I have nothing to lose here, Kang-In. You don’t sign them, I would be the greatest shareholder. In that case, I do not need your help anymore to bring Kim Choi Won down. You try and manipulate me and I will expose all the money laundering we have been doing and both of us shall go to jail together. Now, we have another alternative. I hand you Kim Enterprises, what you have always wanted. I get my revenge. We have nothing to do with each other. If you are not interested, fine!”
Yunho brought his hands up to the documents in a bid to tear them.
“Wa… wait! Stop!”
Yunho mentally heaved a sigh of relief. He applauded himself inwardly for making an effect on Kim Kang-In.
“Impressive, Mr Jung. You have surprised me yet again. You got me there. Now, shall we get this done then?”
Yunho let out a sigh of relief as he watched Kim Kang-In pen his last signature on the thick stack of documents.
But he felt a lump form at his throat as he found himself staring at the nozzle of a gun Kim Kang-In was holding to his chest.
***
“JUNSU!”
Yoochun called out, squeezing between the doors of the elevator before they could open completely.
“Yoochun! I’m sorry I could not pick up your calls. I had to get here as soon as possible.”
“Wait… you have to listen to me…”
“Junsu, we should hurry and go now.”
Yoochun frowned and turned at a third voice when he saw Eunhyuk. The former turned back to give Junsu a questioning look.
“Look, Chun, I have no time to explain to you now. We should go in and see what Yunho is up to with Kim Kang-In.”
Yoochun reached out to grab Junsu’s arm.
“No no… you cannot go in…”
“What? It’s okay, Yoochun. I’m sure Yunho had his reasons but I have to stop whatever they are doing now.”
“No, Su… you don’t understand… You don’t know what they are doing… Could you please just listen to me? Don’t go in…”
Junsu froze at the pleading look in Yoochun’s eyes. He did not understand why Yoochun was stopping him yet he could not help but give in.
“Junsu, what are you waiting for? Yunho might be making a huge mistake in there!”
Yoochun rolled his eyes at Eunhyuk’s voice and turned around to give him a dirty look.
“Listen, you don’t know what is going on, so could you please shut the fuck up?”
Junsu frowned at Yoochun’s hostility towards Eunhyuk and thought it would be even harder to explain things to his lover later.
“Yoochun,”
The said man could feel his heart sink when he heard a fourth voice.
“Minwoo hyung…”
A short but charismatic man with a big group of plain clothes cops behind him walked up to the three men.
“Kim Kang-In is in there now right? Where are the documents you wanted to give me?”
“Here.”
Yoochun took out the brown package that was handed to him by Yunho just less than an hour ago from behind him.
“Yoochun, what is going on? What is Officer Lee and the police doing here?”
Junsu asked as he looked from Minwoo to the rest of the cops. Yoochun just kept silent as he watched the officer go through the documents and smile to himself.
“This would definitely take him out. Well, what are we waiting for? It’s Showtime!”
Yoochun was not able to feel the enthusiasm Minwoo was feeling while Junsu’s questioning glare was on him. The officer signaled for his men to follow him into Yunho’s department.
“Yoochun, tell me what is going on here…”
Junsu spoke sternly as he waited for the explanation he demanded. Yoochun was about to open his mouth to start explaining when multiple gunshots could be heard being fired from inside the office.
Yoochun, Junsu and Eunhyuk was startled by the sudden loud noises and rushed into the office without thinking.
“Stay back!”
Minwoo commanded and pushed the three young men to one corner as he kept his watchful eye on the scene before him with his pistol in his hands.
“Yunho hyung!”
Junsu cried out when he saw Yunho’s lifeless body lying just outside his own office in shattered glass. Blood could be seen oozing out from his body. As much as Yoochun wanted to get to the man on the floor himself, he tightened his hold on Junsu to stop the smaller man from dashing out into the possible cross fire.
“Get off me, you fucking cops!”
Yoochun, Junsu and Eunhyuk looked to the direction of the voices and Kim Kang-In could be seen being tackled by four men onto the floor with his hands cuffed behind him. They continued to watch as Kang-In was dragged past Yunho’s form on the floor. The cuffed man stopped in his tracks.
“Well well, Jung Yunho… you really outdid yourself this time. But too bad… the police are a little too late… Hahahahaha!”
“Kim Kang-In, you asshole!”
Junsu shouted out as he continued to struggle against Yoochun’s hold on him. Yoochun could feel his eyes burning up with tears of rage.
“Kim Junsu…”
Kim Kang-In eyed Junsu with a smug look on his face as he was being led closer to them.
“You asshole!”
Junsu shouted like a madman as he made a lunge for the man but was quickly held back by Yoochun and Eunhyuk. The police officers also made a move to stop him.
“Oh… I would like to say thank you to you for selling your company to me…”
Junsu could only blink at what he just heard.
“It’s a pity Yunho could not see this look on your face! Hahahahaha!”
Kang-In sniggered as he was dragged away by the police.
“What?”
Junsu said breathlessly as Kang-In’s sickening laughter could still be heard through the corridor. At first, Junsu did not know what to think. But very slowly, he began to turn towards Yoochun. From the guilty look on the other’s face, Junsu could already tell Yoochun knew exactly what was going on.
“What did you do, Park Yoochun? WHAT DID YOU DO!”
Junsu repeated as he grabbed desperately at Yoochun’s arms with tears now streaming down his cheeks.
“Mi an hae… Junsu ah… Mi an hae…”
Was all Yoochun could manage as he tried to avert the hurt and betrayal reflected in Junsu’s gaze.
***
“Su…”
“Don’t talk to me…”
Yoochun’s heart froze at the cold, hard voice that came from the small man in front of him. He thought he had already prepared himself for this. But he had not expected the pain to be so much that even death would have been more consoling.
They were still waiting outside the emergency room for news on Yunho’s condition. Eunhyuk was just sitting quietly beside Junsu.
“Su… please…”
“No… I will not talk to you until I know Yunho hyung is alright. Just fucking leave me alone.”
Yoochun had to look away as he brought the back of his hand to his mouth, hoping to bite his tears away.
He did not expect Kang-In to shoot Yunho. It did not make any sense to Yoochun. Kang-In was just after the company. He had to be. All that he did was just to get the company. It would not do him any good to commit murder.
Or maybe Kang-In was crazy in the first place. Maybe Yoochun made a terrible mistake of asking Yunho to help him. If anything happens to Yunho, Junsu would never ever forgive him.
“Doctor!”
Yoochun turned his head abruptly as nurses started to stream out of the emergency room and to Yoochun’s relief, Yunho could be seen being pushed out.
“How is my brother, doctor?”
“The patient’s gunshot wound is fine. The bullet missed his heart and we have successfully extracted it.”
Relief washed over Junsu’s face as he finally let out the breath he was holding in. Yoochun leaned his head against the wall and closed his eyes as he too let out a breath.
“However,”
All three men turned to face the doctor again.
“We found broken bits of glass in the patient’s head. I understand from the officers he was shot at close range and so the impact caused him to fall through a glass window. I believe that was how the glass pieces got there. It is most unfortunate that a long piece penetrated the patients’ brain. Preliminary observations are that the patient may lose his sense of sight due to the injury. I can only give you the detailed diagnosis after more tests. You can see him now but due to the anesthetic, he would only regain conscious tomorrow morning.”
The doctor excused himself and walked off, leaving Junsu speechless and weak in the legs. He stumbled to sit back down as he buried his head in his hands. Eunhyuk carefully placed his hands over Junsu’s shoulders to show him comfort.
Yoochun was still standing by the wall, motionless and colour drained from his face.
“You FUCKING ASSHOLE!”
Junsu lunged at Yoochun and pulled the other by his collar.
“What have you done? Look at what you have FUCKING DONE!”
Yoochun did not dare meet Junsu’s gaze as tears kept streaming out from his eyes.
Junsu’s tears would not stop flowing out as he clenched his teeth and grabbed so hard at Yoochun’s shirt that his knuckles were turning white.
Eunhyuk did not know what to do and just stood by the side.
“Why did you have to ask Yunho to spy for you? Why?! How could you ask him to do such a dangerous thing?!”
PUNCH!
Yoochun fell to the floor limply, not able to find any strength to stand up. He could already taste metal in his mouth but it did not hurt as much as his heart did.
Junsu walked over despite Eunhyuk’s efforts to stop him and pulled Yoochun up to face him again.
“Talk! SPEAK! FUCKING tell me WHY!”
PUNCH!
Junsu wiped his flowing tears away from his face as he stormed over to where Yoochun was and picked him up to hold him by the collar again.
“Why did you make use of my trust?! You of all people! YOU KNOW HOW I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE LIE AND MAKE USE OF ME! How could you do this to me? I trusted you and that was why I told you where my seal was. Yet, you took my seal and sold Kim Enterprises to Kim Kang-In. Then you used the money laundering evidence between the company and Kim Kang-In to nab that asshole. Now, Kim Enterprises is being frozen by the police force for the illegal dealings. I have fucking lost my family business… everything my father did to build up his business is gone. He is never going to forgive me. And this is all because I TRUSTED YOU! HOW COULD YOU FUCKING MAKE USE OF MY TRUST?!”
Junsu broke into uncontrollable sobs as he tightened his hold on Yoochun’s collar. The latter’s face was already covered in tears as he watched the person he loved with all his heart crumble before his eyes.
“Mi an hae… chong mal mi an hae… Junsu yah…”
Yoochun muttered in between sobs. Things were not supposed to turn out like this. He had planned to explain things to Junsu the minute Kim Kang-In was arrested. Yunho was not supposed to get hurt, let alone blinded. He truly underestimated Kim Kang-In. That guy was a lunatic. He should have known. He should have.
“No…”
Junsu said weakly, but sternly.
“You are not sorry… you are NOT SORRY AT ALL! You just wanted revenge against Kim Kang-In… that was all you thought about! You don’t even truly care about me… all you cared about was how to get your revenge on him! You were just making use of me so that you could get your revenge you SELFISH SON OF A BITCH!”
Desperation was reflected in Yoochun’s eyes.
“NO NO! That is not true! I care about you… I CARE very much! Junsu please… Don’t say that…”
“You are so cruel and selfish… How could you hurt my loved ones and me just to seek revenge… how could you…”
Junsu had subsided to just rambling as he let go of Yoochun’s collar and slowly backed away. Yoochun on the other hand was getting all worked up.
“No no no… those were not my intentions… It’s really wasn’t… please listen to me, Junsu…”
“Get away from him, you bastard!”
Eunhyuk finally could not hold back and decided to step in. He could tell Junsu was on the brink of breaking down.
“If not for revenge, what other intentions would you have?”
“Fucking shut up! I’m not talking to you!”
“No… I’m not letting you get near Junsu…”
“If you did not sprout your mouth off with Junsu… things would not have come to this end!”
“Don’t use me as an excuse.. Jung Yunho is lying inside now because of you!”
PUNCH!
Eunhyuk could feel a searing pain through his jaw where Yoochun’s fist just landed and he could taste blood in his mouth.
Yoochun looked like he lost his mind as he sat on Eunhyuk and kept throwing punches in his face. The despair he was feeling was just eating him up. What Eunhyuk said finally made something in him snap.
Eunhyuk was too stunned to move and could only use his hands to shield his face.
“PARK YOOCHUN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”
Junsu shouted when he saw what Yoochun was doing. It only served to make the young man more furious.
“Stop this NOW!”
Junsu gave Yoochun a strong push and the taller man fell over to the ground. Junsu then quickly bent down to help Eunhyuk up.
“You alright, Hyuk?”
Yoochun just sat on the floor, laughing bitterly to himself.
“Go away, Yoochun… you’re just making a spectacle of yourself here…”
Junsu said in disgust, but most part in anger as he stared at the laughing man on the floor. He really could not face him at that moment. It was not because he was betrayed that Junsu was upset with him. It was how Yoochun still chose to betray him when he knew how much Junsu hated it. The other man knew Junsu would not be able to withstand another betrayal but he still did it anyway. Junsu did not know if he would ever be able to forgive him for doing that.
“You still love him, don’t you?”
Junsu turned sharply to look at the man on the floor when he heard what Yoochun said.
“What?”
“You still love Eunhyuk… that is why you refuse to listen to me… You wanna go back to him right? Don’t try and lie to me about him… Yunho hyung told me everything…”
Junsu did not know he could feel angrier at Yoochun until that moment.
The younger man was aware that the parts of his heart that died with Eunhyuk’s supposed betrayal and departure was revived after their conversation. He could not ignore that. He wanted to… but he could not. Yet, his heart was still beating for Yoochun, that Junsu was sure. But he could not believe the older man had the cheek to find fault with him after all the trouble he had caused.
“Since you listened to him and believed that Yunho was working for Kim Kang-In… it also meant you don’t hate him anymore… in fact… you’ve only really loved him… isn’t it?”
Yoochun slurred as he met Junsu’s gaze with his bloodshot eyes. He felt like he was hearing whispers in his head again. He was losing grip on his sanity.
Junsu could not believe what he was hearing and decided he could not listen on anymore.
“Park Yoochun… I swear, if you don’t disappear right now… I will kill you…”
“You know what… you were right… I cared more about revenge than I did about you… I don’t even know if I ever really loved you…”
Junsu could feel his heart being broken into untraceable pieces. He only said that in a fit of anger but to hear it from Yoochun’s mouth was just heart-wrenching.
“Now that I have had my revenge, and you have seen through me… plus the grand entrance of Eunhyuk here… I think we are all pretty clear what the ending should be…”
Yoochun said in distaste as he pushed himself up from the ground.
“We probably never should have started… You were just using me as a rebound, I, using you for revenge… it was a mistake right from the start…”
Junsu felt like he could break down any moment but he was not going to let that happen in front of Yoochun. He was not going to let the other man see just how much his words were tearing him apart. He forced himself to put on a brave front though his heart was bleeding.
“Now that your old flame is back… you could go back to him without feeling guilty… You don’t owe me anything… we’re quits now… and you’ll never see me again… Goodbye, Mr Kim.”
Yoochun did not wait for a reply from anyone and walked away briskly.
Once Junsu was sure Yoochun was out of earshot, he collapsed to his knees and could only sob quietly as he lay his head on the cold and hard hospital floor.
Genre: Drama
Pairing: Yoosu
Story: Park Yoochun has a dark past he stashed away. Kim Junsu has a painful love he wants to forget. They hate each other's guts when they first meet yet Fate has it that they stay in each other's present. But what holds for their future?
Disclaimers: I don't own the characters.
Warning: Vulgar language
Author's notes: Sorry if I made you guys wait! I am not completely satisfied with this chapter but I figured I would not do much change to it anyway... so I decided to post... hee... Thanks for all your lovely comments!!! Here we go!
[chapter 1] [chapter 2] [chapter 3+4] [chapter 5] [chapter 6] [chapter 7+8] [chapter 9] [chapter 10] [chapter 11] [chapter 12] [chapter 13] [chapter 14] [chapter 15] [chapter 16+17] [chapter 18] [chapter 19] [chapter 20] [chapter 21] [chapter 22] [chapter 23] [chapter 24] [chapter 25] [chapter 26] [chapter 27] [chapter 28] [chapter 29] [chapter 30]
Chapter 31
Silence ensued for a long time since Yoochun uttered that last sentence. The atmosphere around the two men could have brought the temperature down by a few degrees.
“I can’t believe you are really the one…”
Yoochun finally spoke again, not waiting for Yunho’s answer.
Yunho stroked his jaw in a nervous manner before he went back to fumbling with his hands.
“How did you know…? Because of what I said?”
Yunho spoke in a small voice, tired out from putting on the mask he had since he started to work in cahoots with Kim Kang-In.
“Partly… I already guessed as much when I agreed to meet you. What you said about Red Phoenix merely confirmed my suspicions. Kang-In needed someone powerful enough in the organization to help him and besides Junsu, you are next in line. I know you never thought much about Junsu’s father. When you asked Junsu yesterday if he was shot, I was almost sure it was you. No one mentioned anything about guns, unless of course you heard it over the phone when Kang-In fired his shot. You were the one who called Kang-In, right?”
Yunho’s breathing was getting heavier and the heaving of his chest obvious to Yoochun’s eyes. The older man seems to be thinking of what to say.
“You are smart, Park Yoochun… Yes… I am the one working with Kim Kang-In… and I was the one who called him… but I was trying to stop him! All these… hurting Changmin, hurting Auntie… hurting Junsu… is not what I signed up for.”
“Don’t be stupid, hyung… You should have known what Kim Kang-In is like.”
“I DIDN’T! I did not know he was a nutcase! Everything was simple at first… but then YOU came along and things started to get out of hand!”
“No… it wasn’t me…”
“YES IT WAS!”
Yunho’s voice started to get louder and angrier.
“It was all your fault, Park Yoochun! Kang-In only started hurting people when you told Junsu what you found out. Everything was supposed to be kept under wraps… and done over with quietly… but YOU had to come and blow matters up!”
“Do you really think Kim Kang-In would have let you all off once this is over?”
Yoochun asked irritably, feeling a lump in his throat at what Yunho was saying. Yoochun did not know if there was any truth in it. But he refused to be blamed for Yunho’s stupid decision to work against his own family.
“I could have dealt with it, but now he is just doing all these things because of you!”
“Don’t blame your plight on me, Jung Yunho. You know better than I do that Kang-In had no intentions of leaving you or Junsu or anyone else alive after this! That is the kind of person he is!”
“I don’t know anything anymore alright! Fuck!”
Yunho banged on the old wooden table and caused a slight dent in the wood.
“Fuck Kim Kang-In! Fuck you Park Yoochun! Everything was supposed to be simple! Nobody was supposed to get hurt! And now… everyone I care about is hurt… everyone…”
Yunho ran both his hands through his hair as he let out a grunt. He had not thought his loved ones would get hurt for his decision. He did not expect Kang-In to be a complete maniac when he agreed to work with him. He definitely did not expect Kang-In to hurt his family. Now, things were really getting out of hand.
“Why did you do it, hyung? To get back at Mr Kim? How are you and Kang-In working together on this? What is in for you?”
“Don’t use that tone on me, Park Yoochun! You think I’m doing this for some kind of monetary benefits? I want Kim Joi Won to have a taste of losing everything. He thinks that by providing for my livelihood after my mother’s death, he is doing his duty. If he had taken care of my mother right from the start, she wouldn’t have fallen sick. She would not have died. Since he thinks he could hurt people because of his wealth, I am going to take his wealth away from him!”
Yoochun could see fury and sadness in the other’s eyes and thought he could probably understand why Yunho was so angry at Mr Kim. To Yunho, it was Mr Kim who caused the death of his mother. He must hate him as much as Yoochun hated Kang-In.
“So… you are helping Kang-In buy in shares of Kim Enterprises right? So eventually, Mr Kim will lose his entire enterprise to the two of you.”
Yunho gave a smirk before he spoke.
“You had everything figured out, haven’t you?”
Yoochun just remained quiet. Yunho brushed both his hands over his hair in one frustrated sweep.
“All I wanted… was to teach Kim Joi Won a lesson… I never intended for anyone to get hurt… no one… NO ONE… was supposed to get hurt... and now… I don’t know how to get out of this mess…”
Yunho finished in a defeated tone. His eyes were bloodshot and his face unshaved. He could not sleep the night before, knowing that Junsu was nearly killed because of what he did. He felt even worse when Junsu’s mother went into critical condition. He may hate Kim Joi Won, but he looks upon Junsu, Changmin and Mrs Kim as family. He never wanted any of them to be hurt. He always thought he was making use of Kang-In to achieve his plan. He only realised the day before he was the one being made use of. And now, he was trapped.
Yoochun looked sympathetically at the man opposite him. Having worked with the man before, Yoochun knew Yunho was not a bad person. He could tell that the older man really cared for his brothers and Mrs Kim. He merely made a really bad decision and he was already suffering for it.
“Stop working with him, hyung. He truly is nuts. You will only get into deeper trouble.”
“You think I did not try, Yoochun? I tried… and the result is… Mrs Kim getting hurt. He is not letting me go…. Because he still needs me for his big plan… and if I try to get myself out of it again… I don’t know who he would hurt next time… Junsu is going to hate me for this…”
Yunho choked slightly on his words as he lowered his head between his hands. Yoochun merely frowned, thinking how he could help the other man.
“I won’t tell him, hyung. I won’t tell anyone…”
Yunho looked up in surprise, not expecting to receive support from the one person he did not trust.
“Trust me, hyung… I won’t tell Junsu, or Changmin… not even Jae hyung and Hyesung hyung. I have a plan but I need your trust… and help.”
Yunho let out a heavy sigh. On one hand, he was trapped in a deadly mess with Kim Kang-In. And now, the person he refused to trust seems to be the only person who could help him. He really did not know how to decide.
Seeing Yunho’s hesitation, Yoochun tried again.
“I’m here to help you hyung. I won’t harm you… you are Junsu’s brother. I would not do anything to hurt Su.”
“I’m not so sure about that yet… don’t get me started…”
“C’mon, hyung… what other options do you have?”
Yunho sighed loudly because he knew what Yoochun said was true. He had no choice. If he continued with Kim Kang-In, his whole family would be in danger. Although Yunho did not trust Yoochun completely, having worked with him, Yunho knows the younger man was dependable. He just did not like the idea that he was once part of Red Phoenix and that he knows Kim Kang-In. Yunho already knew what his options were.
“I’ll trust you this once. But not completely. Whatever you want me to do, you’d better leave my family out of it. Don’t you dare hurt any one of them, Park Yoochun. I won’t forgive you. I’ll kill you myself.”
Yoochun gave a relieved smile despite what Yunho said.
“Leave that kind of talking to me, hyung. It’s not suitable for you. Believe me. I want Kim Kang-In dead, as much as you do.”
Yunho caught the dark hatred in Yoochun’s eyes and hoped he made the right decision this time.
Yunho cleared his throat before he spoke again.
“So, what’s your plan?”
***
Junsu’s face cringed slightly before his eyes started to open. He sat up slowly, rubbing the sleep from his eyes when he felt a jacket fall off his shoulders. He recognised it as Yoochun’s immediately and it brought a smile to his face. But then his smile disappeared quickly when he realised the other man was not in the ward.
Just then, the door clicked open softly and Yoochun’s head popped in.
“Hey…”
“Hey… where did you go?”
Yoochun smiled widely as he entered the ward completely and swung a few bags of what seemed like food to Junsu.
“I bought us breakfast! This shall be our first breakfast together! Isn’t that great!”
Junsu laughed out loud at Yoochun’s silly behavior. He knew the other man was trying to cheer him up, knowing that he was worried sick about his mother. But, oddly, Yoochun’s presence did make things much better for Junsu.
“You silly dork…”
Junsu said playfully as he gestured for Yoochun to place the food down on the coffee table in the small ward. As Yoochun walked past Junsu, he casually reached his hands over around Junsu’s waist and gave the shorter man a quick peck on the forehead.
“For some unknown reason… you make me want to do that… I could not even help myself…”
Yoochun said easily as he looked into Junsu’s face.
Junsu was stunned by the sudden act of affection. As he stood frozen from the shock, a warm and fuzzy feeling washed all over the shorter man. It had been so long since he felt so loved and wanted that he thought he was beginning to feel light headed.
“Su? You alright?”
Yoochun asked worriedly as he realised Junsu staring at him without saying anything.
Junsu blinked a few times before he jolted out of his trance.
“Yeah… it’s just… It’s been so long… you know… since someone had shown affection for me like that… I don’t know how to react…”
“Are you kidding me? You reacted quite appropriately last night if I may say so… today’s just a peck!”
“Last night was different… Somehow, it was intense, what with the events of the day and you punching me and all… my emotions were not within my control already… I don’t know… I had sort of calmed down since… and this… just… threw me off my feet… … but…”
“But…?”
Junsu smiled to himself before he looked into Yoochun’s face and smiled even wider.
“I love it… go-mal-wo…”
Yoochun’s face turned slightly serious as he whispered what he wanted to say next.
“Thank you for letting me…”
Both men began to lean in to get closer to one another. As their lips met gently, an unspoken promise of togetherness was sealed.
Yoochun knew then how hurt Junsu was from his previous relationship and how big a step the other man took to finally give his heart and soul away again… to Yoochun. The older man felt fear at that thought as a voice in him warned him of the decision he had made together with Yunho. A decision that could make Junsu leave him.
“I wanna bring you somewhere…”
Yoochun said as they broke apart. He did not want to think about anything anymore. He just wanted some time alone with the other man. Junsu looked ready to say something but the taller man started again.
“I know you would want to stay by your mother’s side… but the doctors already said she would not wake up till tonight. I will call Jae hyung and Hyesung hyung to keep a watch on her… and I promise we would not go far… If anything happens, we’ll be back here in no time. It’s not everyday Kim Kang-In would be behind bars... I just wish to spend some time together. To be somewhere where we can put everything behind us for a while…”
Junsu’s mouth formed a line, as if in thought. He finally gave a slight smile and nodded. Yoochun beamed with delight.
***
“Just a few more steps… and we’ll be there!”
Yoochun called out excitedly, walking a few steps in front of Junsu, who was following behind, clueless about where they were going. He only knew they had been walking through grass as tall as the two of them and all he had been doing was pushing the plants out of his way, earning slight cuts from the sharp leaf blades as he did.
“Here we are!”
Yoochun announced chirpily, as he led Junsu out from the plants and into an open space. Slowly, a beach came into Junsu’s view. Yoochun had brought him to a small shore which overlooks the vast ocean. Junsu realised he was holding his breath in.
“Magnificent, eh? I discovered this place by accident once, while I was being pursued by rival gangs… back when I was still working for Red Phoenix. This place is like a personal heaven for me… I would lie here for hours, just listening to the waves and looking out over the horizon.”
Yoochun was already lying on the sand with his arms behind his head and his eyes closed. Junsu thought he looked really peaceful and it was something he had not seen the man reveal. The shorter man began to make himself comfortable beside his lover.
“I would come here… whenever I feel frustrated… or upset… usually… upset with my father…”
Yoochun trailed off and Junsu could see him frown.
“I would just lie here and listen to the waves… and try not to think of the unhappy things… it helps… which is why I brought you here.”
Yoochun propped himself up on his side to face Junsu. The latter did the same.
“You are probably really frustrated and have much on your mind… I just hope by bringing you here, you could forget about your troubles… at least for a while…”
Junsu smiled.
“Go-mal-wo… Yoochun ah… I do feel much better now… but I know as long as you are around… things just seemed a little brighter…”
Upon hearing that, Yoochun leaned in and captured the lips he was getting so addicted to. Junsu’s eyes fluttered close as he tasted Yoochun in his mouth slowly. Both men savoured the kiss with a gentle hunger. They hoped to just devour the other but yet they enjoy the closeness as they explored each other patiently.
Feeling the burning urge between his legs, Yoochun decided he had better pull apart from Junsu before he did something drastic. Not that he did not want to, but it was just not the time for something like that. As if thinking the same thing, Junsu did not complain when Yoochun pulled himself away.
“Used to these acts of affection yet?”
Yoochun mused, hoping to distract Junsu from realizing the obvious bulge in his pants.
“Loving them so far… ”
Junsu winked, as he lay down on the sand again, with his eyes closed. Yoochun also made himself comfortable so that he would be able to cool down.
“I have been wondering…”
Yoochun’s eyes shot open from the voice. He did not know if he had fallen asleep.
“What about?”
Junsu heaved a huge a sigh before he continued.
“Who exactly in the company is working with Kim Kang-In?”
Yoochun could feel a tightness around his chest. He swallowed.
“When I was held captive by Kim Kang-In, he received a call. From the way he was talking to the person, it seems as if the person on the line knows me… and is concerned about my safety.”
Yoochun remained silent. He hoped Junsu would not begin to put pieces together and suspect Yunho. Knowing how much Junsu treasured his family, he would be heart-broken. Yoochun’s plan would not be carried out either. He did not want to tell Junsu anything yet because he did not even know if his plan would work. But he did not want to lie to the man.
“Who do you think it might be, Yoochun?”
Yoochun’s lips formed a line and he could feel his heart beating faster at the question. He had to think of something to say.
“It could be anyone, Junsu. Any regular employee of the company knows you and would naturally be concerned about your safety. Think about it. If they are working with Kim Kang-In for some sort of benefit, they are just after the money. I don’t think any of them would want to be charged for murder.”
Junsu looked deep in thought. He seemed to think what Yoochun said made sense. Yoochun mentally heaved a sigh of relief.
“I guess that makes sense… that just makes it so much harder to find out who the spy is. If we do not find out who the person is soon, I’m just afraid of what Kim Kang-In might do when he is released.”
Yoochun could understand how heavy Junsu’s heart must be. His mother was in a coma and he must fear for the safety of his family and his company. Yoochun wished he could tell Junsu that the spy was already on their side and that they would definitely find a way to beat Kim Kang-In at his game. But Yoochun was sure if Junsu knew what he asked Yunho to do, he would not agree to it. The taller man also knew he was putting Yunho’s life in danger but it was the only way for them to get Kim Kang-In once and for all. For the sake of the bigger picture, Yoochun could only trust that Junsu would forgive him when he finally found out.
“Junsu…”
The said man turned when he heard the heavy tone in the other man’s voice.
“If I did something wrong… anything at all… would you forgive me?”
Junsu cocked his head slightly at the seriousness of Yoochun’s tone and expression. He licked his lips before he answered.
“By now, you should know I give myself completely in a relationship. When I do that, I trust whom I love totally. I guess that also means I would forgive whatever wrong they did. So… I guess the answer is yes… why are you asking me this question?”
Yoochun’s expression remained solemn.
“I did something very grave…”
“What? What did you do?”
“Well… I… I forgot where I parked the car.”
Yoochun laughed out loud at that.
“What?! You are such a dork, sometimes…”
“You will forgive me, right?”
“You are being stupid… I don’t forgive stupidity!”
“You said you would forgive me, no matter what wrong I do.”
“This is different!”
“No, it isn’t!”
“Get off me!”
“No… not until you forgive me!”
“Stop it! You’re being childish!”
Yoochun finally jumped off Junsu’s back and the smaller man was pounding his spine where Yoochun had jumped on earlier. The taller man could be seen smiling sheepishly.
“I don’t know what you are thinking sometimes…”
“I’m sure you will know me very well in time to come… Heh…”
Junsu laughed at the dorkiness of his lover and loved seeing the smile on the other’s face as the evening sun’s rays shone behind him. Junsu was glad he finally gave in to his feelings.
“We’d better head back… think we were out long enough. Let’s drop by my place for a shower before we return to the hospital.”
“Sure.”
Yoochun smiled at Junsu as he took the other’s hand in his. Junsu thought he was grabbing a little harder than usual but did not mind it as he let Yoochun lead them back to the car. He hoped Yoochun was kidding about forgetting where the vehicle was parked.
As Yoochun pulled Junsu behind him, his heart and mind was a mess. Although what Junsu said gave him some faith that the younger man might forgive him in the end, Yoochun knew he was betraying his lover’s trust in him. He needed to feel Junsu’s hand securely in his before he could convince himself that all he did was for the best. All he wanted was for Junsu to be safe and happy. Even if it means, he might not have Junsu by his side.
A nagging fear was ringing in Yoochun’s head.
“Would you forgive me, Junsu… if I betrayed your trust?”
Rating: NC-16 (vulgar language)
Genre: Drama
Pairing: Yoosu
Story: Park Yoochun has a dark past he stashed away. Kim Junsu has a painful love he wants to forget. They hate each other's guts when they first meet yet Fate has it that they stay in each other's present. But what holds for their future?
Disclaimers: I don't own the characters.
Warning: Vulgar language
Author's notes: Aish... I'm so sorry for taking such a long time. I had this chap out some time ago... but jus procrastinated posting it.... because I'm having writer's block as usual.... arghz... after this... i don't know how i'll take to update... so sorry!!!! Anyways... I hope you guys will like this. I really appreciate all of you who have stayed with this story!!!! ^_^ I cannot thank you guys enough!!! OKies.. here we go! :)
[chapter 1] [chapter 2] [chapter 3+4] [chapter 5] [chapter 6] [chapter 7+8] [chapter 9] [chapter 10] [chapter 11] [chapter 12] [chapter 13] [chapter 14] [chapter 15] [chapter 16+17] [chapter 18] [chapter 19] [chapter 20] [chapter 21] [chapter 22] [chapter 23] [chapter 24] [chapter 25] [chapter 26] [chapter 27] [chapter 28] [chapter 29]
“Hey…” “Hmm?” Yoochun and Junsu were standing at the balcony with their hands clasped and placed on the railing, just gazing out at the night scene before them. Both men were standing with their bodies touching, partly because of the cold wind, but most part because of their newly affirmed love. “Never mind…” Yoochun turned to eye Junsu with a frown on his face. It was unlike Junsu to be so hesitant. “What’s wrong?” Junsu did not speak. “Hey… come on… talk to me…” Yoochun cooed as he stroked the hand he was holding on to. Junsu looked to Yoochun for assurance before he took a deep breath. “My heart was broken before, Yoochun… into pieces… It was so bad that I locked myself away… for a long, long time… ” Yoochun remained silent as he continued to hold Junsu’s hand in his bigger one. The smaller man had looked away. “It was so bad that I made my mum upset and sick… I never forgave myself for doing that… so to put her mind at ease, I stopped shutting myself out… but only physically… mentally, I still refused to open up to anyone… I was so broken that I refused to trust another person again…” Junsu turned to face Yoochun yet again. “Until you came along… Somehow… you made it easy to trust again… I just… I just trusted you…” “I’ll take that as a compliment…” Yoochun commented with a slight smile, hoping to lighten up the atmosphere. It worked. Junsu seemed to be lightened up a little. “I guess it is… I wanted to love again… but I was so afraid, Yoochun.” “Afraid that your already broken heart will be broken again?” Junsu nodded slowly. “That was why you transferred me away to work under Yunho, isn’t it?” Junsu nodded wordlessly again. “You’re one stupid ass…” “Hey… I’m offended by that…” “But you cannot deny you are…” “Yes… I am denying… I am not a stupid ass…” “But if I say I like stupid asses?” “Don’t start to get all mushy with me now… I’m still not used to it…” “Ha… fine…” Silence. “Trust me with your heart, Junsu.” Those words were spoken gently, yet firmly as Junsu took in the husky voice. “I’ll never break it… Not if I can help it…” Junsu merely smiled and grasped Yoochun’s hand a little tighter. “My heart is already with you, Yoochun… its fate already sealed… because if it gets broken again… it would be dead… I will never love again… So like it or not… you are going to be my last…” Yoochun let out a light chuckle. “Hey.. what are you laughing at? That was supposed to be romantic…” “Ha… I’m sorry Su… it’s just… so funny hearing you speak like that… I guess I have some getting used to to do as well… Heh…” Both men just looked at each other and laughed together. But their happiness was short-lived. “Hyung!” A frantic voice broke the tranquil Yoochun and Junsu were basking in. Both did not have a good feeling about what they were going to hear. “Min?” “Auntie… she… she…” Changmin’s stuttering only served to make Junsu’s heart beat faster. Without waiting for the youngest to finish, Junsu ran back into the hospital again, with Yoochun and Changmin running behind him. “Su!” “Hyung!” Junsu spotted Yunho and picked up speed. The look on Yunho’s face made Junsu more worried. “What’s wrong with Mum? Quick TELL ME!” “Auntie… auntie’s condition is critical… The doctors are tending to her now…” Yunho choked on his words, upset that Mrs Kim’s life is in danger and knowing full well Junsu was not going to take well to the news. All colour drained from Junsu’s face as he took in Yunho’s words. Yoochun watched and was afraid of Junsu’s reaction. “No… no… NO!!!” Junsu shouted as tears welled up in his eyes. He made a move to barge into the ward but was quickly held back by the other three men. “Junsu! No! You cannot barge in there… the staff are trying their best… they are!” Yunho shouted while pulling Junsu back with all his might. Yoochun had his arm around Junsu’s waist as he tried to pull the agitated man back as well. “I have to go in and see her… I HAVE TO!!!” “Hyung… please calm down… I’m sure Auntie would be fine… ” Changmin tried to persuade even though he knew Junsu would not be listening. “JUNSU! STOP!” Yoochun shouted loudly as he used whatever strength he had left in his right arm and tugged fiercely to pull Junsu back. The smaller man finally budged and was dragged a distance away from the ward. Yoochun quickly stood between Junsu and the ward. “No Yoochun! Let me go! I should have stayed by her side! I should not have run off to Kim Kang-In… I should have stayed! Let me go in and see her… I have to see my mother!” “No you can’t… you cannot see her now! LOOK AT ME!” Junsu’s face was already smeared with tears as Yoochun willed the smaller man to face him. “Your mother knows… Junsu… She knows she cannot leave you like this and she won’t… You have to believe she will come back to you… You cannot help matters by barging in right now… the hospital staff will try their best… They will…” Junsu was already sobbing as he held on to Yoochun tightly. “Trust me, Junsu… your mother will be fine… But you have to pull yourself together first… please… We’ll be here for you… I’ll be here for you.” After he finished, Yoochun gently wrapped his right arm around the trembling man to bring him close as he kissed Junsu’s hair in a bid to calm him down. He could already feel Junsu’s tears wetting his shoulders. Junsu wanted to believe Yoochun’s words were true. But he knew Yoochun was right about one thing – he could not help matters by barging in. Yet, he badly needed to see his mother, even for one second. He should not have wasted his time with Kim Kang-In when he should have stayed by his mother’s side. Now, he may not see her breathing again. As Yoochun’s body warmth spread through his own body, Junsu leaned into the taller man as he buried his tear streaked face in the crook of Yoochun’s neck to cry freely. At that moment, Junsu needed the other man like he had never needed anyone else before. “Hmm…?” A sleepy grunt could be heard coming from one of the two figures sleeping on the couch in a particular hospital ward. Yoochun stirred a bit more before he finally opened his eyes, but only to squint them close again because of the lights in the ward. He slowly opened his eyes again and waited for his vision to focus. When it did, he found himself smiling, because he was looking at the most adorable sleeping face. Yoochun was probably looking at a sleeping Junsu for the first time and he could not help but stare. Junsu looked so child-like and innocent, absolutely different from his overbearing character while he was awake. Unable to help himself, Yoochun reached over to push Junsu’s fallen fringe aside. He then leaned in to kiss his forehead, glad that Junsu was sleeping peacefully now, as compared to his agitated condition the night before. Junsu’s mother pulled through the crucial night and the doctors confirmed that her condition has stabilized, though she was still in a coma. It was only then that Junsu lost the weight on his heart as let his fatigue take over. Both him and Yoochun eventually fell asleep on the couch in Mrs Kim’s ward. Yoochun moved off the couch slowly, afraid to wake the sleeping man. Junsu had a long, tedious day. Yoochun decided it was only right for him to rest more as he covered Junsu lovingly with a jacket. Suddenly, Yoochun felt a vibration in his pants pockets. He then realised that was the source of his wake-up call earlier as he looked once at the number reflected. His expression darkened and he quietly left the ward to answer the call. “Yul bo se yo?” “Yoochun… we need to talk.” “My sentiments exactly.” “Meet me at the park across the hospital. Come alone.” “I’ll be there.” Click. Yoochun walked briskly, crushing dried leaves beneath his shoes as he looked in search of a familiar face in the quiet park. “Yoochun…” Yoochun turned to the sound and spotted the person he was looking for. He took a deep breath before he walked over. It was not going to be a pleasant conversation. “Hyung…” “Sit down.” Yoochun nodded and sat across from the other in the small pavilion. Both men remained silent for a while. “You… and Junsu… are together already… aren’t you?” Jung Yunho decided to break the silence. When he saw how Junsu grabbed and relied on the other the night before for comfort, the older man could already sense their special relationship. But he needed to be sure. Yoochun tensed a little as he did not expect that question from Yunho at all. He had not thought about how Junsu and him behaved that night because he simply had no time to think about it. Reflecting back on it, he understood how Yunho came to that conclusion. Everyone knew they both had feelings for each other in the first place. Yoochun would not be surprised if Hyesung, Jaejoong and even Changmin were thinking the same thing. “Yes… yes we are hyung.” Yoochun stated, hesitantly at first, but decided there was nothing he had to hide, especially not his relationship with Junsu. Yunho let out a heavy sigh and turned to eye Yoochun intently. “I had warned Junsu against you, Park Yoochun. I don’t like you… I don’t trust you… and that is no secret. I never wanted Junsu to be with you when I found out your relations with Red Phoenix. But I had no control over his feelings. And the worst I was afraid of had finally happened.” Yoochun stared back with the same intense look, angry that Yunho was judging him and speaking of his and Junsu’s relationship like it was some kind of sin. But he remained silent as he waited to hear what else the other man had to say. Yunho was breathing heavily from the anger he was feeling. He should have tried to stop Junsu. Park Yoochun was just trouble. Yunho was afraid of the hurt that was awaiting Junsu. “Leave Junsu. You are not for him. Go as far away from him as you can. You are nothing but trouble.” “No.” Yoochun said, firmly and in a dark tone, even before Yunho finished his sentence. Yunho’s eyes widened at the sudden refute, not expecting such a reaction from the man opposite him. Yunho saw a dangerous glint in the other’s eyes. “I am not leaving Junsu, no matter what you say, hyung.” “I’m not playing games with you, Park Yoochun!” “Neither am I!” People walking past the pavilion were starting to stare at the two men speaking loudly to each other. “I am not going to let you hurt Junsu. I treat him like my own brother and I am not going to allow you to ruin his life! If he gets hurt again, he will never be able to pull himself together!” “I will not hurt him!” “Wouldn’t you? Haven’t you done enough harm? First was Changmin, then Auntie and Junsu nearly got himself killed! How much more trouble must you Red Phoenix people bring us!” “You Red Phoenix people?” Yoochun questioned as he eyed Yunho suspiciously. Yunho’s eyes started to dart left and right when he realised what he said. “Hyung…” “I told only Junsu I was from Red Phoenix… and I am sure Junsu did not tell you that… how did you know?” Yunho avoided Yoochun’s gaze and swallowed nervously. “You’re the one working with Kang-In… aren’t you?”
Chapter 30
Yunho looked up at Yoochun’s sudden calm voice.
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